These are a collection of funny Filipino jokes I have translated into English.
Still Crazy
One day, the doctor visited his 3 mentally-ill patients in the mental institution...
DOCTOR: Wow, you all are improving!
PATIENT 1: I am reading a book, Doc!
PATIENT 2: I am writing a poem, Doc!
PATIENT 3: (Sitting on the table) I am the light on the table, Doc!
DOCTOR: (Bit disappointed) No, you are not a light! Get off the table, now!
PATIENTS 1 AND 2: Please don't turn off the light, Doc!
The Absent Pupil
One day, the teacher visited Johnny at his home. Johnny was surprised and ran to his grandpa.
JOHNNY: Grandpa, quick! Please hide!
GRANDPA: Why should I hide?
JOHNNY: I skipped class for 5 days! I told the teacher you died!
Crazy Thoughts
Meanwhile in a mental institution...
DOCTOR: Are you thinking about your family?
MENTAL PATIENT: Of course! They are still on my mind.
DOCTOR: (Excited that his patient is improving) Oh? Where's your family then?
MENTAL PATIENT: Hello??? They are still on my mind, you idiot!
War Heroes
Three drunk friends were discussing their grandfathers' World War 2 exploits during a night of heavy drinking.
PETER: My gramps killed over a hundred enemy soldiers during the war before he was killed!
MAX: That's nothing! My grandpa killed 500 enemy soldiers before he took the bullet!
JOHN: My grandfather was the best! He only killed only two enemy soldiers but they were your grandfathers!
Resemblance
JOHN: Whenever I bring every one of my girlfriends home to meet my family, my mom doesn't like them.
PETER: Easy fix! You bring home a girl that resembles your mom.
JOHN: I tried! But my father hates those kind of girls!
With the Beauties
JOHN: Last night, I dreamed that I was with the 85 contestants of the Miss Universe Pageant!
PETER: Wow, buddy, you hit the jackpot!
JOHN: Yes, I won that contest!
Sources: http://www.pinoyfailblog.com/2013/10/100-best-pinoy-jokes-of-all-time-11-20.html http://www.jokespinoy.com
Follow me as @darthnava: "The Horse is Strong in this one."
haha, so funny jokes indeed, i really enjoy reading them especially those mental patients, thanks for sharing some nice amusement with us, Stay awesome
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JOHNNY: Grandpa, quick! Please hide!
GRANDPA: Why should I hide?
JOHNNY: I skipped class for 5 days! I told the teacher you died!
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I am glad you liked it!
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:)
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Ha ha "War Heroes"
I remeber my grandfather, was a soldier from WW2.
My father told us that he would be a member of these gang where they ambush even fellow filipinos just to rob them. He is in a way abandit :/
Not funny though.
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This community more such post.
Great one man:)
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Hahaha..hasola apoha oi..
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ha ha ha. i am enjoy this
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Those are really make me laugh thanks..haha especially the soldiers and the family haha
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Hahahaha😃so funny
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lol The Absent Pupil i do liked it the most !
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hahahahahaha......so funny jokes
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really so funny
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Ha He Ha He He He He.......... Really funny jokes. Onek Moja Pailam.......@tuhin201
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This is nice. A filipino who has such an influence in steeemit. Hope you support me and my friends here. :) Thank you!
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haha great sense of humour lol
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Something really funny I do not understand what to talk about
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very beautiful, nice funny
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ya, all of jokes are hillarious and enjoyed.
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haha nice funny jokes
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Hahaha....such a wonderful and really funny story by @darthnava
Wel done buddy...
Cheers~~~~
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This post has received a 10.30 % upvote from @booster thanks to: @darthnava.
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