One-liners and other short JOKES!!! :D

It's been a long week, but now the weekend is here, so let's have some FUN!

Wow, what a week!

We had TheDAO ocean liner hit an iceburg. https://steemit.com/thedao/@xeroc/ongoing-attack-on-thedao---eth-draining-from-the-pot

Co-Founder Dan introduced himself. https://steemit.com/introduceyourself/@dantheman/daniel-larimer--co-founder-of-bitshares-steemit

Lot's of cool people joined Steem and made #IntroduceYourself posts. Welcome to the party!

It's the Weekend! Time for FUN!

Let's share some jokes and have some laughs! I like short, as in brief, jokes; or one-liners. So here are 10 jokes, guaranteed to make you laugh, or your money back! :P

1. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. - Groucho Marx

2. Why did the dog sit in the shade? Because he didn't want to be a hot dog!

3. What does a teddy bear say when you offer it a sandwich? "No thanks, I'm stuffed"

4. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer

5. What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef Jerky!

6. What did the pig say at the beach on a hot summers day? I'm bakin'

7. Me: "Mom... dad.. I decided to live on my own from now on." Them: "Ok, cool." Me: "Your luggage is outside."

8. GUY: How long is a million years? GOD: A minute. GUY: How much is a million dollars? GOD: A penny. GUY: Can I have a penny? GOD: In a minute

9. At 11:59pm Cinderella should have said to the Prince, "I bet you a million bucks I can turn that carriage into a pumpkin."

10. "Are you crying?" "No, I`m impersonating a fountain."

Now it's YOUR Turn!

Share some of your favorite short / quick/ brief / one-liners / jokes in the Comments!
Thanks, and have a great weekend!!! :D

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But wait, there's more!
3 more Bonus Jokes on my popular short story for @stellabelle 's contest:
https://steemit.com/steemit/@kenny-crane/the-thought-experiment-an-original-story