It's Done.
Listen, I know you said a photo won't be necessary and I do thank you for paying in full upfront like that, but damn. You owe me a new wood chipper. How many gallons of milk did you feed your husband before you decided you were sick of being his maid? His bones were harder than stone.
It was going well, then I heard a squeal, then a thud. I saw smoke, this chunk flew out, then it stalled. There's at least $700.00 worth of damage here and I'll be expecting to see that in my Bitcoin wallet by Monday.
No funny games, no police, this isn't extortion, I just loved that machine. I appreciate your understanding in advance.
Warning:
If you have stumbled across this message and are not the intended recipient, you may be in danger. Forget everything you've seen here today, starting now. Turn around, face the tall brown building beside the little red one. See the 'X' on the ground? Stand on it.
Next, reach up to the sky. Stretch! I bet that felt good. Now, lunge and kick and lunge and kick! Scream out, "Good job ladies!" Now reach again! Reach for the sky! And lunge and kick and lunge and kick! Cool down! Breathe. In and out and in and out. Now reach again! Yeah! Just like that! Feel the burn. Hold it there! Hold it! Now drop and give me twenty! Don't be lazy! Remember, you're being recorded for my Youtube channel and we only have one shot at this. DO NOT screw it up!
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Smart man. Now... kick and lunge and kick and lunge!
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I would expect something like that to be covered in the chipper's warranty, unless it's the Limbslayer 2000. They ask too many questions, for one thing.
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I bought the damn thing used from an online garage sale Facebook group, no questions asked. It never gave me any grief until this incident. Those were freak bones or the dude was a superhero. I still can't decide on which one.
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The fine print on the box probably would have a clause about superheroes anyway, oh well. Maybe the ransom will come through.
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It better come. The blender takes too long.
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I imagine it went something like this.
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Close. I could tell that was fake though. Too many inaccuracies to count. Where's the fine mist? No gurgling sound? That producer should be fired.
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Ha! Yeah, at least someone out there got this...
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I was gonna go with Jane Fonda, but Richard is so much funnier :)
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That was idea behind the joke. Totally based it on Richard.
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He is the king...queen?...of aerobics and my mother-in-law's idol. I took her to see him for her birthday one year at Cornell University. She got an autograph and a hug, total weep fest all the way home.
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I always thought of him as a comedian who combined his gimmick with aerobics and made millions. I think I'm right. Behind the scenes he has a deep voice.
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Hearing him talk with a deep voice would be hilarious. His hair always gets me, and even at over sixty it's exactly the same.
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Nice
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Thanks!
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This post has been ranked within the top 80 most undervalued posts in the first half of May 19. We estimate that this post is undervalued by $10.57 as compared to a scenario in which every voter had an equal say.
See the full rankings and details in The Daily Tribune: May 19 - Part I. You can also read about some of our methodology, data analysis and technical details in our initial post.
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very nice art with fun.
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