Misconceptions I had as a child: A list

in funny •  8 years ago 

  • The distance between where I threw the baseball, and my brother's face
  • The distance between where I threw the tennis ball and the light bulb in the hallway
  • Just a bunch of hand eye coordination problems here 
  • That I, aged 9, was perfectly competent on watching a 10 month year old. (She fell off the bed but grew up perfectly fine, I guess.)
  • I thought that "Montague" (Romeo's surname from Romeo and Juliet) was pronounced like "montage", until one day in freshman year, my teacher made me read R&J out loud and publicly shamed me for not saying Mon-TAG-Hue.  
  • I made up my own alien language that nobody knew but me. I thought that would help me read better. 
  • During September 11, (while I was in grade school), I thought we were sent home early because the principal was sick. When my dad picked me up early, I said I wanted to go to Chuck E Cheese's because I didn't have school. He said it was too dangerous. I got mad because I thought he was just too lazy to drive there.(Flash forward to me now, cringing)
  • My mom had the misconception that she could put me through dance lessons to keep me in shape. But every time my dad and brother would drop me off, they'd always tease me that they were going to Chuck E Cheese's while I was dancing. So instead, I skipped class to go with them. 15 years, 140lbs later I kind of wish I didn't
  • Before the advent of GPS, there was MapQuest, (No waay) I was invited to a girl's birthday party at Chuck E Cheese's. According to my dad, the address on the invitation was the local one. According to my mom, it was an entirely different chuck e cheese that we've never been before. My dad eventually won the argument and we went to the local one. When my friends weren't there, my mom just stared at my dad and whipped out the already printed the directions for the other chuck e cheese. It took an hour to get there by traffic, and when we got there they both realized that the party was at the local one, on a different day. But I still got to go to Chuck E Cheese
  • Thinking that I alone could have won enough tickets to win Soc Em Boppers at Chuck E Cheese. Every damn time...
  • Thinking that spending a lot time at Chuck E Cheese's was cool
  • Thinking that I wasn't cool, pretty, or smart enough
  • That I would have a stable marriage, house, job, and a kid by my mid twenties


Shout out to the li.st app for inspiring the prompt! Its a really good app, and some really cool people are on it:)

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