New Funny Jokes In English 2018 (Latest And Humor)

in funny •  6 years ago 

21686452_2449882028673900_1146162467466176669_n-e1506043259433.jpgAre you guys looking for some new funny jokes in English? If yes, you are in the right place. Laughter is the best medicine for your brain and body. A good joke lightens our burdens, inspires hopes, and connects you to others. Besides, a good joke can enhance the relationship and support both physical and emotional health.

New funny jokes in english:-

  1. My girlfriend’s birthday is in two days.
    And she told me “Nothing would make me happier than a diamond ring”.
    So I bought her nothing!

2)An airplane was about to crash.
There were 4 passengers on board, but only 3 parachutes.
The 1st passenger said “I am Stephen Curry, the best NBA basketball player. The Warriors and my millions of fans need me, and I can’t afford to die.” So he took the 1st pack and left the plane.
The 2nd passenger, Donald Trump, said, “I am the newly-elected US President, and I am the smartest President in American history, so my people don’t want me to die.” He took the 2nd pack and jumped out of the plane.
The 3rd passenger, the Pope, said to the 4th passenger, a 10-year-old schoolboy, “My son, I am old and don’t have many years left, you have more years ahead so I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute.”
The little boy said, “That’s okay, Your Holiness, there’s a parachute left for you.
America’s smartest President took my schoolbag.”

3)Difference between a beautiful night and a horror night.
Beautiful night is,
When you hug your teddy bear and sleep.
Horror night is,
When your teddy bear hugs you BACK.

4)Once all the engineering professors were sitting in one plane.
Before the takeoff, one announcement came
“This plane is made by your students”
Then all professors stood up, ran and went outside.
But the principal was sitting.
One guy came and asked, “are you not afraid”?
Then the principal replied
“I trust my students very well and I am sure the plane won’t even start”.

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