I AM NOT ON A DIET.

Hello friends,

I recently delved into the exciting and gratification denying world of Paleo. For those of you out of touch with social movements and FADs, the Paleo diet is centered on structuring your food consumption ONLY around foods available to hunter-gatherers thousands upon thousands of years ago. What does this mean for the average Joe? NO MILK. NO PASTA. NO RICE. NO PEANUTS.

Now don't pick up the razor just yet -- at least let me finish my filibuster. I have found it excruciatingly painful to describe, to others less informed, my food consumption regimen. I tell them, "I am doing the Paleo Diet." I should mention I am quite lean, not bones and skin, but also not Jabba the Hut.

Immediate responses typically include, "YOU'RE DOING WHAT?" "WHY ARE YOU GOING ON A DIET?" Immediately fighting the urge to give them a discipline slap (Remember fathers and husbands, back of the hand is discipline, open palm is abuse), I manage to utter the words, "A diet does not always mean a weight-loss regimen."

Say it with me guys and grills, "A diet does not always mean a weight loss regimen." In fact, that denotation of the word is Beta to the Alpha definition, which states:

di·et1
ˈdīət/Submit
noun

the kinds of food that a person, animal, or community habitually eats.
"a vegetarian diet"
synonyms: selection of food, food, foodstuffs;

A "diet" is simply what comprises your food selection, which just happens to be more strictly followed or tailored -- when someone is trying to achieve some sort of significant weight loss or health shift. Once again, by association with a common interest of humans, a word's main definition has been completely ignored and forgotten. I AM NOT ON A DIET. But I love you all.

Cheers,
Evan