Conversations With Bud

in funny •  7 years ago 

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Bud: How much do you love my latest official portrait, Human?
Me: It's difficult to find the right words...
Bud: I agree...too fabulous, isn't it? I'm thinking it should go in the Smithsonian to make sure it gets the right exposure.
Me: You want to expose your tongue to America?
Bud: And what better place to do it than where our entire leadership is behaving like a bunch of third-graders? Raspberries, I say! Canine condemnations to all the congressional culprits under my cursing countenance!
Me: Bud. Dial it back. Besides, I really don't think our Congress hangs out at the museum.
Bud: In that case, just hang it over our fireplace. I'll make sure you look at it when you order the wrong toppings on my pizza.

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President Calvin Coolidge owned at least a dozen dogs.

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