A Short Comedy About The Prison Industrial Complex

I was watching TV the other day, and this show comes on about life in female penitentiaries. First of all, I have to say, the show is as vanilla as it gets, it was as if someone was purposely trying to normalize this new growing trend of mass-incarcerations.

"They're not really trying to play down the harsh reality of prison, are they?” I thought to myself.

As you have probably guessed, I’m talking about Orange Is The New Black, the one show that got jail inmates nationwide go: “Oh my God, that’s exactly how I feel!”

Is this how prison is? When can I move in? says your lady friend while you’re still trying to figure out if you’re being desensitized about the horrors of prison.

You bite your tongue anyways cause let’s face it, you don’t wanna ruin the mood so you keep your thoughts to yourself cursing whoever invented that "political correctness" nonsense.

You keep watching and somehow a strange feeling starts invading your heart, a feeling of forgiveness towards the 30's Germans who lived under the slick brain-washing of Nazi propaganda.

Oh my God! This is how they do it! This is how they manufacture consent.

Goebbels you son of a bitch! What can I say? The guy is an evil genius, if he lived in Gotham city, Batman would be toast – To quote Charlie Sheen.

Well, I guess that’s what happens when you live in a prison state.

What prison state? Says your friend as if the two of you come from two entirely different planets.

You don’t wanna get into a argument so you suggest that she could research female penitentiaries in America on another occasion.

Just google it!

I knew it the second it came out of my mouth!

You don’t even get to finish the sentence and she’s already on her phone.

God I hope it’s cats she’s looking for!

Her face at present is like a poem. It took her about 30 seconds to realize that one third of the world female prisoners are currently incarcerated in the United States, one third!

“I think I just lost my innocence” she says to you, although she’s 28 years of age.

I know what you're thinking, one third of the females in rape camps is really not the kind of numbers you’d expect from a first world country, and you’re right, it’s not.

The last time we’ve even approximated those numbers, there was a certain Genghis Kahn trying to populate the planet.

Keep in mind, 1 of every 200 people in the world descend from that dude.

The problem however, is that this is not a gender specific issue, far form that in fact, the prison industrial complex has an audience so big that 25% of the world's prisoners are currently "staying" there. Michael Jackson concerts couldn't fill faster than this, and they’re just getting started, matter of a fact someone just pointed out that it's hands down the fastest real estate development the world has ever seen.

So I let that sink in for a moment, 25% of the world’s prisoners. They took Stalin and his entire Gulag archipelago and told him: “You know nothing Jon Snow!” Which reminds me, the season finale starts in a hour, so I better keep this post short today.

"How do they attract so many newcomers? What's their secret to success?" One can speculate but when you hit the numbers of 25% of the world's population, my guess is even the marketing team at The Four Seasons are dying to know.

You take a closer look, you get even more shocked as you realize that 86% of inmates doing harsh time in the world's number one jail colony were actually thrown there for something they call victim-less crimes.

“In 2011, 86% of federal prisoners — hundreds of thousands of mostly minority Americans — were in a cage due to victimless crimes,” – George Donnelly of the Jury Rights Project.

So you see, it's not that one day people just collectively woke up on the evil side of the bed, it's that's the prison industrial complex started giving quotas for clients brought.

The largest real estate development, huh? I thought they were kidding.