Absolutely Hilarious Lies

Today I was not in the mood to get out of bed so I pulled my phone closer and decided to see what the people I'm friends on facebook with were up to. I came across one of my Facebook friends telling his story, It was so good I just had to share it...

Lets face it, we all hate telemarketers, I don't even think telemarketers like telemarketers. So it comes as no surprise that people will lie to these people to get them off the phone (some just hang up without having any fun ). This man decided to have some fun.

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The telemarketer who called was selling insurance, this in his own words is how things went down.
"I just told a telemarketer that I was the supreme commander of the South Pole expeditionary team, and that we would only be interested in their products if they had coverage in the pole caps.

She believed me. Apparently they are going to investigate how they can get me coverage and get back to me.

I'm not holding my breath, though, as they can't even get me decent coverage at home."

I decided to have a bit more of a laugh I was going to search the internet for more funny lies told to telemarketers. (I usually tell them I'm 16 and will have to ask my mom. I've been 16 a really long time now)

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So here are some of the ones I loved that would get rid of the person on the other side of the phone.

• Ask “Where should I send the invoice for this call? I’m a consultant and I bill for my time.”

• One of our family hobbies is telling whoppers to telemarketers. My son once told a telemarketer that his mother was having a baby and the house was flooded. He said he was talking to her from the roof, and that he needed to get off the phone to call 911.

• Say “Congratulations! You’re caller number seven and you’ve won a free trip to the Bahamas. Just give me your full name, address, phone number and credit card information and I’ll make all of the necessary arrangements for my vacation... Sorry, I meant YOUR vacation.”

• Whenever someone from the Philadelphia Inquirer phones to try to sell me a subscription, I respond with: “My attorney has advised me not to speak to the press. And she’s also told me I can beat this rap!” That usually breaks them up.

• If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.

• Cry out in surprise, "Judy? Is that you? Oh my God! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of terror as she tries to figure out where she could know you from.

• If the company cleans rugs, respond: "Can you get out blood? Can you get out goat blood? How about human blood?"

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• Tell the Telemarketer that you work for the same company, and they can't sell to employees.

• Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask him/her if he/she will give you his/her home phone number so you can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me either!" Hang up.

• Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke. "Come on, Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your momma?"

• Ask the telemarketer to find your friend Mike last name Rotch. Claim you will only buy a subscription from them.

If these don't make them hang up, You could always go with a classic...

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Here's a little something to make you laugh

xoxo
@thegoldencookie