Shia LeBeouf and I are competing to see who can sell the most tickets to the movies we are each currently starring in.
What a coincidence, neither am I.
I know you have never heard of me and he has been in some pretty big movies like Disturbia, The Transformers and Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, but I really thought I could take him.
Currently I am only losing by 1 ticket!!!!
That is correct. His new movie Man Down has only sold one more ticket than me.
Unfortunately I don't think I can possibly catch him.
Why you might ask?
I have never been in a movie. Nor do I intend to be in one.
That is correct, I have no movie and Shia is only beating me by 1 ticket sold. That is because when his new movie "opened" in one and only one theater in the U.K. only one person went.
It may be true that this was just a publicity stunt (the movie was simultaneously released on digital demand) but 1 ticket is still pretty bad. Doesn't he have any family members. When my kids are in a stupid school play we have to buy at least six tickets.
Poor Shia.
Oh wait. Maybe things are looking up for Shia.
Nobody dressed like this could be sad.
I wasn't in a movie once too, so I can relate to this.
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It seems to be a common problem amongst mankind... maybe we should start a club.
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Maybe make a movie about what it's like to not be in a movie?
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I think that would work quite well, what a great idea!
We'll just use a lot of small parts, you know, like all of the zombies in The Walking Dead. We could solve this problem for so many people!
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I could dress up like a tree and just stand there!
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Oh my gosh, genious! I think we have our name now: Zombies in the forest.
Time to call Joss Whedon!
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I already know what my big scene will be. Someone will say, "Okay tree, you can leave now," and I'll blow up into a big pile of leaves just like Fall time.
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It will be magical... Maybe we should turn this into a musical.
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That would be great! We could use the proceeds to not save the local rec center that is not being threatened to shut down!
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I heard the roof wasn't leaking anymore so that's probably the best idea.
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Sorry I missed this party. I was exhausted from not running a marathon and had to sleep.
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Yeah, sorry about that. We got a little excited over here.
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Hope you get silly and carried away again, that was really fun reading 🙂👍
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Yeah, I enjoy that as well. There's plenty more on my blog. Some is rated R though. You've been warned! :)
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SOLD!
Following now 😜 🤜🤛
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I hear he likes playing capture the flag.
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