Is there such a thing as being Messenger PWNED?

in funny •  7 years ago  (edited)

 Is there such a thing as being Messenger PWNED? 

I was wondering how to start off with this blogging stuff, what to write about etc. I thought I would just write about events that happen in my life.  

For anyone who doesn't know what PWNED means "Powerfully owned, dominated" So now you know - PWNED means.

This happened to me last week and I decided to share it with you because it’s actually rather funny, even though I got Messenger PWNED. If that's not actually a recognised name for it, it is now! 

I don’t know about everyone else but I seem to still get this social media thing wrong!? I do think that maybe I should stop giving a bugger about it quite so much too or just don’t allow myself the responsibility of going on social media? I think the way people communicate now, has changed from where we were before technology like this. There’s a definite kind of flippancy to conversation and contact/reply. Maybe it’s because now you can see if someone has read your message and it rankles when they just sit on it? Does it really matter that much because, if you text or email someone (….that’s like so old fashioned OMG!) then you don’t know if they’ve seen it or not until they reply to you. If they reply to you that is! 

I don’t think I like Messenger for anyone other than tried and tested friends and family, only because they know me and my weirdness. I also forget that when sending messages, they are actually going into someone’s lifebubble.

Picture this, they're sitting enjoying the evening and your message is received and temporarily, you are actually there in spirit. You've forced your way into their evening! You may as well have invited yourself in and sat down next to them on their sofa, pour yourself a glass of their wine, why not? In fact, go the whole hog and kick your shoes off. Put your feet on their coffee table.

So, I bump into an acquaintance the other day at a small launch party. As always, she is looking super awesome. Perfect makeup, not too much. Amazing hair, I mean amazing hair and a smile to match. She has a real presence in the room, she makes a bee line for me because I'm stood right in front of her. Not sure that's 'making a bee line for me'. Anyway, we’re chatting. Well, to be truthful…..she’s enthusiastically asking me how things are for me and giving me all the attention a person could possibly want. She always makes you feel really good about yourself, ‘high fives for your successes and you’re looking great, so pleased for you’ kind of conversation. 

Anyone else had this?  What do I do? 

My cup is so overflowed with compliments that I talk just about myself and didn’t really ask about her. Even, when she involves me in another conversation, I still don’t give her the attention. Later that day, I’m sitting at home, feeling very shallow because I didn’t ask her about things in her life. I didn’t congratulate her on her successes, which by the way, are far bigger than mine. I don't have an inferiority complex but it's starting to sound like I do have one? I wait until the next day and I messenger her, which is where it all kind of came off the rails! 

I send an over the top apology for being shallow and not asking about her. So I ask about her but I forgot to congratulate her on recent achievements……..and then I send messenger No2!! What was I thinking of? Now I really sound shallow and desperate. I only go and congratulate her so massively, that I look like a stalker and guess what??? Yup, I see that she’s read it and she doesn’t reply to either at all, at any time. I’m not talking about a few hours…try a few days. I’m starting to feel the glow of all the compliments fade away, awkwardness now lives there and realising that I have just made a complete arse of myself and this was without any alcohol onboard. 

I think I need to give you more of an idea of just who this wonder woman is. She’s very tall and a strongminded person, she doesn’t do anything by halves and she achieves whatever she puts her mind to. A beautiful big house in the country, a handsome and successful husband, a beautiful daughter and many impressive successes of her own. She has an amazing life, the sort of person who is so content with what they have achieved, that they don’t brag on Facebook because they don’t have to pretend they have it. She’s proud of what she has and so she should be. She’s worked extremely hard for them, including her 'bounce a pea off' abs. And she’s a truly lovely person to boot. 

Fast forward a couple of days and I’ve been looking at jobs abroad, we really want to skip off to another country…that’s hot! I saw that in Mexico, the beauty product sellers are apparenetly on a massive wage. This lady is from Mexico! At this point, maybe I should have skipped the country to save myself from myself?

I can hear some you taking in a sharp breath of cringing and yes, I did send her another message with the link. Why the hell? Because I’ve been feeling a tad awkward about our previous thread…you know, the one where it was only me talking incessantly? I thought I would appease my feeling of awkwardness by adding yet more to it, keep stuffing that shit down your shirt! She used to be an independent beauty product seller, which was where our paths crossed in the first place. The time she wanted me onboard and I didn’t really know how to say no in the end, when I realised how glamorous these people are and I’m not. I’m perfectly happy with who I am by the way and what I have. 

I said, somewhat tongue in cheek, ‘Why aren’t you out there with your beauty business and enjoying the sunshine and better pay?’. 

I get a reply back now, not to either of the other two messages, just this one but it was a reply. 

‘I’m a lawyer now’, she says politely.  The ultimate cringe was the last few words wishing me all the best and me realising why she didn’t respond to my clumsy flattery…because she doesn’t need anyone to ‘big’ her up, certainly not me. 

I think I’ll leave it there folks!     

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Thank you for such a great introduction! Really loving this place even more <3