THE SHEER PEN
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Down the Road of Emotional Abuse
Peace Wejinya / September 11, 2018
Have you ever been here? It’s a place of subtle pain but leaves great scars…
Do you remember those words that made you feel less than who you really are? Have you ever had to beg for attention? Have you ever tried to keep a conversation with a less concerned person? Have you ever been left to wonder what was wrong with you? Have you ever had someone magnify the wrong you did that you lost hope in yourself or felt stupid? Have you ever had to say yes because that soft spot of yours had been touched manipulatively? Have you ever had to apologise to someone who wronged you so that peace can reign? Have you ever had to always be the wrong one who needs to be corrected? Have you ever felt hated or irritating for joking and wished you never said anything. Have you ever had to change so much about yourself because someone couldn’t just accept you for who you are? Have you ever had to walk on eggshells so you don’t get something spoiled or broken? Have you ever cried and there was no one to listen? Have you ever needed something from someone who could have helped but they told you off or pretended like they didn’t know about it and later asked you to do stuffs for them? Have you ever been ignored when you tried to express yourself and then you felt like you weren’t needed? Has someone ever made you feel like you’re wrong and your opinion doesn’t matter? Has someone ever made light of what’s important to you? Has someone ever had to blame you for all the negatives in your relationship with him/her? Have you ever had to be at the forefront of someone else’s dreams but never had that same person bother about what’s going on with and around you? Have you ever felt so great before the world but felt so little in the eyes of someone who means the world to you? Have you ever been punished or reprimanded for reacting to how you feel? Has someone ever had to ignore you or walk away when you’re trying to talk or resolve an issue?
They tell you they care but their actions don’t show it. They tell you they want to be with you but they push you away. They make you feel like you’re the one who’s making excuses not to be with them when you begin to point out their flaws. They give you an ultimatum to decide on what you want so they can do what they feel like. They are too proud to let you in on their feelings so they don’t appear weak, yet they let their feelings get in the way of their relationships. They refuse to discuss important issues and make you move on to the same things that hurt you. They hurt you and still get a chance severally into your heart; and that, they do without apologising or being sorry. They hold on to wrongs and feel disrespected when they don’t get their way. They scold you like you were a child. They are never wrong and act like they are the best. They’re critical and never care about your needs or feelings.
What do you call this? How do you survive through it? What more can possibly go wrong? Can’t you see you’re being emotionally abused? Why are you so scared of walking away? Why is your heart so into it?
You don’t deserve to be treated this way. Someone who loves you should protect your heart by being nice to you in return. Someone who loves you would frown at your weakness but love you through it and never fail to celebrate your strengths.
Say no to abuse!
©Peace Wejinya
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