In this article you will learn:
What kind of friends should be considered poisonous;
Strategies that poison communication;
What to do if girlfriends are poisonous.
In the female circle, a huge place is given to friendship. And that is great. After all, it is so important for us girls to share our feminine energy with each other, exchange experiences, have fun, and pull up friends for ourselves.
I believe in female friendship. There are several friends in my life who have been friends with for decades. We do not have time to call up every day and even more so there is no desire to conduct empty conversations. Each of us is engaged in our own business. From time to time we meet or call up to find out how we can be useful to each other. Sometimes we have joint projects. Life has scattered us in different cities, but we plan our meetings, spend time, money, efforts to maintain our friendship. And if there is no way to see each other, we drink champagne on Skype.
Our environment creates us, and success in all areas of our lives depends on this awareness. If we do not consciously shape our environment, then random people consciously shape us.
If the people with whom we communicate are honest, purposeful, positive-minded, most likely we are the same. But very often it happens that our friends gossip, envy, complain about life and pull us into a decadent state. Stay away from such girlfriends because it is contagious. Without noticing that, we ourselves are drawn into empty conversations that lead to a loss of energy. After such conversations, we feel empty, we do not want to do anything. This is not just wasted time. Such communication is unsafe. We poison ourselves, and then we are surprised that our dreams do not come true and plans do not come true. Some girls may think that they were jinxed or envied by them, and therefore something did not work out, or they fell ill. In fact, through communication with such people you simply merge your energy into the "toilet". And if you do this regularly and for a long time, then you can even get seriously ill.
It is very important for us women to be able to surround ourselves with the right friends and to consciously relate to the quality of communication. Because there are poisonous friends.
POISONOUS FRIEND - it supports the perverted state of mind. This condition is narcissism, the claims, the desire to exploit, to humiliate and to offend their girlfriends. Poisonous friend use plenty of lulling the vigilance of the maneuvers, through which manage to shift the responsibility to another person. Here is their strategy:
GASLIGHTING. This is a manipulative technique used to distort and subvert your sense of reality. After applying this technique you feel like an idiot because you were led to believe that you are just not properly understood. Typical phrases: "No this," "You thought", "This is nonsense" etc. a Person who uses this kind of manipulation, so surely proves to you that black is white and white is black that you just begin to doubt their adequacy.
PROJECTION. When your friend is chronically unwilling to see their own shortcomings and uses everything to avoid responsibility. She can't understand why people turn away from it, don't want to be friends with her and left. She just has no ability to analyze their behavior, although the words she strongly assures you that working on himself and ready to change. Typical phrases: "You're good, you have a husband (apartment, car, money, anything)", "the World is so unfair", "no One knows how to love", etc. Its purpose is to cause you to feel guilt or pity.
THE CONVERSATIONS, WHICH "BOIL" THE BRAIN. Happened to you, that communicating with a person you find yourself not being able to concentrate and understand what he's talking about? When dealing with a toxic friend, you catch yourself thinking that your sense of reality is lost, and your brains have turned to boiling liquid. This is because these women themselves have a "porridge" in the head and, in fact, arguing with yourself. You're just an accomplice to a long arduous monologue. Typical phrase: they are not. There is a set of ideas, thoughts and feelings about lifestyle, spirituality, the universal evil, etc.
DEPRECIATION. Poisonous women rarely achieve in their professional activities significant results. This is due to inadequate self-esteem. They lack the inner strength to build a career. And all because such people can not stay long in one place. They think that they underestimate, "podsizhivayut" and exploited. Picked up a basic knowledge from different areas, they consider themselves great experts with a broad Outlook. They boldly argue that well-versed in your industry and teach you, making your criticisms. Arguing with them is useless and not necessary. Devalue you for them – like "piece of cake". In conversation, these women try to emphasize their importance by making reference to the acquaintance with famous people.
Typical phrases: "I'm dealing with something, too," "I worked with themselves ...". All these are signs of hidden aggression typical of toxic relationships. If you find these symptoms in her friend, one way out – leave. The sooner you do, the better. It is not necessary to hope that it will change. Such people almost never change. Here we need deep psychotherapy.