After being subject to surveillance, the fear lingers.

Being subject to surveillance is a sickening feeling. Not knowing if the people in your reality are trustworthy, or if they are acting on behalf of a private security firm or a federal agency makes you question your relationships - personal, professional and even intimate.

I lived for five months in a prayer camp in North Dakota during the DAPL Water Protectors movement. I was mainly a cook. Making breakfast was my primary responsibility, although I cooked many a lunch and dinner too. Bison, bacon, eggs, potatoes, squash, oatmeal - you know, the foods which people are glad to find on their plates after they have finished their first cup of coffee.

I helped in many areas of camp. I wanted to help the people to halt this detrimental infrastructure. I wanted to support native women warriors, I wanted to support indigenous youth, and to protect the water. I wanted to be a Water Protector, and I did my best to halt the dangerous and illegal construction.

During our time at camp we were heavily infiltrated by private security firms who were trying to derail our popular movement, including agents working for the FBI. One of those agents has since turned state’s evidence against a political prisoner, Red Fawn Fallis. He first developed an intimate relationship with her in the Rosebud camp on the Standing Rock Reservation, with the intention of building a legal case against Red Fawn. She is a prominent figure and a strong woman, who worked tirelessly to help the International Indigenous Youth Council. Her efforts made her a target for private security firms and federal agencies, who allegedly framed Red Fawn by planting a gun on her while she was being arrested. It IS a common practice among law enforcement in the USA to have throwaway guns; and there is video of an agent coming in to “retrieve” the gun during Red Fawn’s arrest. A gun which was later traced back to the FBI informant who had seduced Red Fawn.

We all knew there were infiltrators. Sometimes it was difficult to pick them out, but in other cases it was as clear as the nose on my face that they were outsiders there to create problems. Because we were so heavily infiltrated, trust levels were low, and levels of paranoia were high. Living under constant surveillance, with planes and helicopters flying low in the middle of the night to disrupt sleep, and flood lights constantly on, we were subjected to psychological warfare.

While in camp I used my social media accounts to rally support, and to effectively get accurate information out of camp. The mainstream media was betraying the truth, and skewing public opinion by selling the narrative created by the private security companies. The narrative that we were violent radicals, verging on jihadists. Their narrative is not supported by any video, photos or interviews. They made it up.

As a result of the lies being propagated by private security and the media, we were treated with hostility in the nearby towns and shopping districts. People were assaulted in restaurants and at hotels, and the police never held these violent citizens accountable for their attacks on peaceful individuals around the state.

During the time after we were forcefully evicted from our prayer camp, I headed toward Washington DC to attend a march and demonstration with indigenous people from around the world. Along the way, I stopped to document the threats caused by tank yards in Patoka, Illinois. Threats such as hydrogen sulphide - a known cancer-causing carcinogen; also benzene, which pollutes air, water, and soil, and which also causes cancer in both people and animals when exposed to it.

While I was making a video of the warning signs and conditions of the tank yard it came to my attention that a middle school was less than a mile away from the place, and well within the blast radius of multiple pipelines; and steadily exposed to benzene and other known cancer-causing carcinogens. Also while making the video I was threatened by a private security guard. They used their vehicle in a threatening manner, and endangered anyone on the road by driving backwards through intersections and pursuing our vehicle despite the fact that we were on public roads, and of no threat to anyone.

The protester camp’s eviction was in the beginning of March, the Washington DC rally and demonstration were in the middle of March, three months later in June I was contacted by an international news publication, The Intercept. They were seeking permission to use my name in an upcoming article. The Intercept had received leaked documents from a private security company, TigerSwan. Those documents included reports that I had been considered a person of interest in property destruction which had been carried out against the pipeline, sabotage which two women eventually took responsibility for during a publicity stunt where they defaced the Iowa utilities board sign in protest of the boards failure to protect the water from the dangerous pipeline, and the media blackout of their sabotage.

In the time before these two monkey-wrenchers turned themselves in, the Fusion Center in North Dakota, and TigerSwan in multiple states, along with the FBI and unknown numbers of police agencies across the country, were considering me a potential criminal, and violating my right to be considered innocent until proven guilty.

During this time, my brother and his wife were visited by black SUVs. SUVs which stood out in their rural country neighborhood, they were clearly searching for me; and in the papers leaked to The Intercept it was shown that TigerSwan suspected that my brother’s place would be my ultimate destination.

For the record, I am not a saboteur. I don’t use property destruction to carry out my goals, or to affect the change I believe the world needs. Instead I believe that peaceful, first-amendment protected action is the best route to influence change peacefully, prayerfully and legally; which is in alignment with the vision carried by the indigenous youth who lead this movement.

Still, I was surveilled, singled out and lied about, and my file was transmitted by TigerSwan across state lines with the assertion that I was a criminal saboteur. I was pursued across the country by private security firms; firms who had previously violated state law by providing private security services without permits. Many of which were carrying weapons without permits, and had previously used their weapons in acts of intimidation in North Dakota - again without repercussion. In fact, the person who disarmed a violent security agent was charged but the person who had brandished his loaded AR-15 was not charged.

Now, a year after the eviction of our camp, I still wonder about the amount of surveillance which I am subjected to, knowing as I do that I am not acting in any criminal manner. Also knowing that the agencies have no reservations where bearing false witness is involved; knowing that the POTUS has been actively engaged in profiteering from big oil, and private prisons. I am concerned that my social media is monitored. I also wonder if my bank and medical records, and personal life are also subject to higher levels of scrutiny.

I try not to let my mind play too many tricks on me. I do honestly wonder though about the sincerity of the individuals in my life, and whether they are interested building friendships out of caring, or if they are acting for the oil interests on behalf of private security or even federal agencies.

I know uncertainty is bad for my mental health. I understand that my wellbeing is being harmed by my uncertainty. What I am certain of is that private security and federal agencies have colluded to single me out in the past. I have had it proven to me by The Intercept. I just don’t know who to trust anymore.

Proofreading credit to the Steemit Creators Guild.

Thanks for reading this far!
Here are a couple of videos where I explain my experience in North Dakota during the Standing Rock Prayer Camps.
Video 1, Video 2.
This post is about environmental racism, and this a blog entry from inside of Sacred Stone Camp.