More bad headlines - funny edition

I am stepping away from any real news outlets in the present day because it is all BS all the time and every single publication and station out there isn't actually reporting anything at all, they are just slanting real information and distorting and picking and choosing whichever information supports what they want the truth to be. Basically they are doing the opposite of journalism. The fact-checkers aren't any better.

What a time to be alive! Almost everything you see in the news is at least in part, a lie. Propaganda was something that I thought was airdropped on an enemy population to convince them to feel a certain way and well, the same thing is happening now only there aren't any airplanes involved probably because of Covid restrictions.

Instead, we are going to go back in time to when people actually read newspapers and look at some mistakes that really should have been caught and reworded by the editor. This is a job that I had when I was in college working (for no salary) at a publication that had a weekly circulation of around 30,000 units. I would have caught these mistakes and I wasn't even being paid.

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I'm certain that if you dug into the article a bit (I didn't) you would realize that they are actually compiling a log of all the people that were arrested on February 22nd, rather than stating that everyone was arrested. Presuming that this was written in a native-English speaking country, this is beyond shameful on both the part of the person who wrote it and the editor in charge.

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I really hope they spent a lot of money on getting this research done because this is information that we need to get out to the general population as quickly as possible. If this was satire, it would be great, but unfortunately it is not. Maybe they were referring to the hit Bee Gees song?

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It is often said that meteorologists and the "weatherman" have the easiest jobs on the planet because there are no repercussions if they are wrong. This particular weather expert was playing it really safe when he or she made this call. I would be willing to bet that they were correct!

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I blame babies for a lot of things such as ruining the atmosphere of nearly every restaurant and airplane that they happen to be in. The fact that they are constantly pooping their pants is a bit annoying as well. But now that we know it is in fact directly their fault that populations are increasing we should probably get the police that were involved in the first article to pay them a visit.

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That'll do me for now. In the meantime I encourage you to stay away from any "real" news for at least a few more weeks. The stress that it will cause you if you even care who wins the US election is simply not worth the information especially since what you are hearing is likely skewed or just outright lies.

Instead let's just have some funnies and try to carry on with our lives in as happy a manner as possible.