Dear Diary: It's Just Hopeless To Talk To My Nurses

It is good at least I have an audience here at steemit, friends that I can relay my thoughts about what is happening in my life which I cannot do even to anyone even in my family as they wouldn't even understand. Just like today where the same story as last time but the only difference is that I didn't crash my blood pressure this time.

Well anyway, I talked to one of my nurses if he would consider taking off all of my extra weight gain because they are just adding more than they are taking out so in turn fluids are building in my body and it adds to my breathlessness between dialysis.

My pleading went into deaf ears so I went home heavier than I want and it shows on my post-dialysis blood pressure. What will happen now is that I will end up dying like other patients under their care and the cause of death will surely be drowning in my own body fluids.

It is good to die anyways but of course I will never be able to achieve my goals in life which are not entirely for myself anyway. My only concern is the discomfort brought about by having an extra fluids in my body. I hope God will defend me from those that make me unwell.