I'm feeling very hot still under this shade
Araba, get off your behind and head home to cool yourself off this heat.
That was when this gentleman stepped in my way. Your face is looking all sweaty Miss...?? Araba. That's my name if that's what you are asking for.
And I'm Kofi. Nice to meet you Araba. Could you please take this handkerchief and wipe your face. I can't stand a beautiful lady like you sweating like this under the hot sun.
We engaged in a little more conversation, exchanged numbers and left. We had agreed to go on our first date after our first phone call. On our first date, he brought beautiful bouquet of roses after I told him I'll be wearing red.
Our friendship developed into something beautiful called love. And here I was, Araba, in love with another man again. One night he came over and picked my phone from the sofa whilst I was in the kitchen trying to fix us dinner. He rushed towards me and squeezed my hair pulling me towards him and gave me a hot slap. I should never see you or your fingers talking or texting any man again. You heard me?? You're mine!!!
At work the next morning, my secretary sends me flowers with a sweet romantic message with his name tag on it.
I freaking love this dude.
I got flowers today
We are a married couple now. He is always promising me he would change. Sometimes he does. And sometimes he doesn't. Taking me on romantic dates, and expensive trips around the world, surprisingly often after long fights or sometimes over stale unresolved arguments we tend to sweep under the carpet.
Once again he quarrels with me over why I refused to declare my salary to him as a woman. You don't respect me oo Araba. He always say. What's wrong with me asking for a couple of bucks to stabilise my struggling business, if indeed you can offer me one?
I work my bloody ass off to provide everything you need for you without asking a dime from you. It will be over you one day, you ungrateful b***
Meanwhile, my people I had been giving him money to stabilise stabilise saa, nothing concrete was happening for him. Anytime I complain, he sounds me heavily on my face.
Which irrationally forces submission out of me to his every will.
The next morning, the usual flowers and shopping spree and weekend suprise get aways will happen again, and he will coercely wash everything away mentally within me.
One night, I was in my nightwear, in a rush to fix him something to eat and unfortunately, I guess, poured in much salt than necessary.
As soon as he tasted the salty stew, he rushed to the kitchen and grabbed me by my left ear. Herh! Stupid girl, come here didn't your mother teach you how to cook? He slapped me so bad my head hit against the wall tiles and I fell flat on the floor.
I got flowers today
Sadly, it's not for a romantic date night anymore but for my own funeral. Death took me away swiftly but staying in an abusive me marriage for so long rendered me a living corpse on earth.
Folks, if you anyone going through an abusive marriage or relationship, help save that person, be it a man or a woman even when they can't seem to save themselves.
Kwame Sarpong
Freelance Writer