appropriate.Image by S. Hermann & F. Richter from Pixabay
How often do we see people who know us well, shrug their shoulders, or shout at us as they say or do, 'What do you like!' How often do we find ourselves reacting in stressful situations in such a way that upon reflection, it is not appropriate or desirable? We can also feel embarrassed, regretful, disappointed, or upset over what happened later.
Would it be helpful to step back a bit and review your triggers, stop and emotionally focus on what's happening inside you, so that you can change what you say and do, or be a little more observant? This may happen? It is possible to separate four different characteristics, which we adopt in different scenarios, each one is either in balance or out of balance, depending on where we are emotional. For convenience, we call them lovers, warriors, clowns, and kings or queens.
Let us see how each of these can affect your life and then identify ways to use them well, so about achieve a better balance in life.
- Lover
can be described as kind, supportive, creative, sympathetic. All familiar, nurturing as a nurturing parent, where you are interested in what others are saying, are eager to get to know them better, and are genuinely eager to be helpful. But when it gets out of balance the lover can become needy, demanding, and desperate to please, an unfortunate way of reacting, especially during a stressful or frightening state in a relationship, when you take it for granted. Are willing to keep it in life. Everything is taken personally when the lover is out of balance.
- The warrior
is often seen as a well-to-do adult; Quiet, reasonable and reasoning, eager to compromise, to negotiate, and find the best way through disagreements or deliberations. But when it gets out of balance the warrior can become angry, aggressive, bullying, and even violent.
- Clown.
I am sure that we all know someone who is good at relieving stressful situations. A glance, a joke, or a comment of theirs immediately relaxes a potential 'drama' and makes everyone laugh at the way things have gone out of hand. It lets people see in a good comical way how they are over-reacting and behaving silly. But equally, the downside of humor can occur when it is used as a force for cruel, threatening treatment when someone becomes a joke character and is ridiculed.
- Depending on your gender, the king or queen
highlights the importance of taking care of yourself and your own needs and personal needs. To ensure that you are taking care of yourself and your health, make decisions and choices that suit you. And when you are in a good place you are in a better position to do good work with others.
- Using these insights allows you to quickly tune into your reactions and become more aware of what is happening in your life, be clear about your triggers, and see those ways From which you can change unwanted behaviors and reactions in a more appropriate way. When you are out of balance and unhappy, you are able to identify better, then move to a more balanced state, and be more in control.
For example,
if you start to notice that when you are sad you become angry, tearful, and manipulative, you may recognize these as symptoms of an unbalanced lover. You can stop and check how you will be. You can then start thinking more clearly, being more appreciative of the other person's point of view, in a better position to open a positive, constructive discussion as a more balanced, properly vocal warrior. Or sometimes introducing self-inferiority can be a great way to break the ice and calm the situation, adopting the role of a balancing clown.
Awareness gives you more control when you recognize and change what you don't like, rather than when you are triggered by situations that prompt you to react in an unfortunate way.
Equally, if you see yourself treating others the way you do, you can use this positive technique to manage the situation and ensure that you get better responses. You can affect the dynamics of the situation simply by refusing to be drawn into negative cycles of their behavior.
By becoming a balanced lover, warrior or clown you protect your king or queen and refuse to react in an angry or upsetting manner. When they do not get any emotional response, as you choose to remain calm and 'in balance', you will shift the energy and they will quickly learn that their negative attitude has to change to something more
Good day, @sanjupargai!
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