Why did I bravely follow my heart, but failed in the end?

in hive-120412 •  4 years ago 

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A few days ago, I received a private message from a reader, Little C, asking about career choices.

Little C works as a civil servant in a third-tier city in the northwest, and leads a nine-to-five life every day, boring.

He obeyed the arrangements of his parents since he was a child, and after graduating from university, he went to the civil service examination according to his parents' wishes. In his words, "I have never made a decision alone in my 27 years of life. It was all others who arranged my life."

But such a long life will inevitably lead to doubts. Little C's friends either went to big city to fight, or started a business in his hometown, only he was still standing still.

Although holding a stable salary, there are no challenges and no waves in life. He began to provide for the elderly as soon as he graduated, which he refused.

Finally, Little C asked me, now I want to give up my job as a civil servant and open a board game club with my classmates.

He also gave me a detailed introduction to the market research he had done, depicting how promising this market is. He just didn't know how to show off with his parents and get them to agree to pursue their inner dreams.

I have actually received a lot of questions like the above, and they are basically the same.

My parents arranged a stable job. I don't like to do it. I think my life should be elsewhere, and I want to listen to my inner voice. So contradictions arise, either swallowing the sound, or running away in anger.

The final ending is also various, the successful homecoming, and the unsuccessful continue to come back to live a nine-to-five day.

I don’t know what everyone thinks, let me tell you what I think.

First of all, it is good to be brave to listen to the heart, but there is a major premise, that is, you must listen with your brain.

When I was young, it was easy to read a few big articles and listened to a few big talks. I felt that the world was in front of my eyes. If I didn't try hard, I was sorry for my youth, so I was All-in.

All reason gives way to dreams, and hormones dominate everything.

I used to have a young subordinate in my company.

I remember the moment when Heycha first became popular, she had to think that the milk tea shop was a big fan, and she liked to drink milk tea, so she resolutely gave up a good-paying job to open a milk tea shop.

As a result, started a new tea brand together with a few friends and lost 500,000 yuan in three months.

Later she ran back to me and complained. I said, have you done any research before joining? Have you read the franchise contract carefully? If you went out with a franchise fee of hundreds of thousands, what kind of support did people provide you? Do you think it is worth your money? Have you counted how many milk tea shops like you are within a radius of 800 meters? Do you have a hot milk tea...

A series of literary questions left her speechless. Finally, she stubbornly said that if she could think so much, she wouldn't open a milk tea shop.

What can I say? I can only wish her success in the future.

You can't do things with passion and no brains. It is good to be brave to listen to your inner voice, but you have to analyze it with a bit of reason to see if the voice is right.

Ask yourself, do you have what others can do and the specific conditions for others to succeed?

Chinese people like to say that the time and place are right and the people are harmonious. Just use these 6 words to evaluate the voice you hear, and write it down with a piece of paper and a pen:

What is the current development trend of this industry, what is the future prospects, are you following this trend? (Time)

What are your resource channels, what is your bargaining power against them, and are others willing to support you? (Location)

Do you have a good partner, do you complement each other's strengths and share the same values? (People)

Today I am not teaching you how to start a business, so I won't start talking about it. But as long as you calm down, you can think of these factors. At the very least, you wouldn't just quit your job the next day and follow along because people say that you can make money by opening a milk tea shop.

Secondly, listening to the inner voice requires not only a brain, but also a very strong belief. And this belief is not groundless, it comes from your real life experience.

In today's society, it is difficult to be brave enough to be yourself. In addition to having no intellectual defects, you must also have strong mental willpower.

On the contrary, as soon as you encounter some small winds and waves, you will overturn the boat of your life, and you will not even have the strength to fight against it. At this time, the so-called self-persistence is impossible to talk about.

Following the inner voice is not the starting point of life, but a phased end of life.

Before that, you have to go through a thousand sails to see the moonlight. Before that, everyone was precarious duckweed, let the wind and rain beat, let the society beat.

You only have to go through all these processes in person, and you will gradually gain confidence. Oh, I refuse this kind of thing and there will be no serious end. Oh, it doesn't matter if I offend those people.

Knowing the consequences of everything, knowing how many pounds you are, will your choice be practical and your inner voice will be firm.

Otherwise, they are all shouting slogans, and on the surface they say every day to listen to the heart, but in fact, the boss dare not say anything when scolding you, which is very embarrassing.

Like some of the people around me who really stick to themselves and who are still successful in life, they are all a bit older without exception.

Everyone has withstood all sorts of frustrations and tests when they were young. Some people were deceived by scammers and lost their money, some chose to go through detours in their careers, some missed several industry outlets, and some did nothing for the first 5 years of their work...

But they will sum up their own experience, write down the lessons they have learned from the pits and detours they have stepped on, and then make a little progress each time.

Maybe they will still be deceived next time, but as long as they are less deceived the second time than the first time, or if they stepped on 5 pits the first time, and only stepped on 2 pits the second time, that is also a kind of growth.

Use this seemingly stupid method to constantly correct and adjust yourself. A review every 2-3 years, every time there is a phased end, once you stretch the timeline, you will find that even the stupid people will gradually become smarter.

And this is the correct way to stick to oneself.

You know which way you went wrong, so now you know which way is right. Once questioned, you have a lot of counterexamples to refute the other party.

Because you have experienced it all, you have the most say. Rather than reading a few articles on the Internet, reading only a few words in a few books, and then eloquently talking, this is called half-bottle water sloshing.

The last point is that brave attempts are not equal to endless attempts. You have to have a stop loss point.

This is the same as stock trading.

Ordinary people always think about bargaining and copy them halfway up the mountain. I am not willing to cut the meat, I always feel that one day in the future, it will definitely rise back, and the more I am not willing to lose, the more you lose.

But this is not the case for master stocks. A few friends around me who have made a fortune from stock trading are very sensible, because they all set stop-loss points when trading stocks.

Once you have lost a lot of points, no matter whether you are willing or not, you have no hesitation to throw it away. The purpose of this is to minimize the loss as much as possible, so that there will be no scenes in the news that go to the rooftops once the blood is lost.

Even if there is no big profit in the future, this kind of sound method can accumulate little and more, and it is more reliable than the desperate gambler.

Of course, there is a lot of attention behind how to set this stop loss point, but today is not to tell you how to trade stocks, but to give you an inspiration:

You should also set yourself an "attempt stop loss point".

Take the case of the little C at the beginning of the article. There is no right or wrong to give up the civil service exam and open a script to kill shop.

The question is, if you go to open a store, will you set a stop loss point?

For example, how much does it cost to invest in the early stage of opening this store?

Personnel costs, rental costs, decoration costs, and the cost of purchasing scripts, all of which are included.

How long does it take to open a store before it is possible to start profitable?

This is closely related to the operating conditions of the store. The size of the store, the number of rooms, how much water can be run at full capacity in a day, the difference in profitability between weekdays and weekends, and how staff costs are calculated will affect the store’s monthly income and expenditure levels.

For another example, in which channels does your store advertise?

Dianping, WeChat public account, Weibo, or Xiaohongshu? How do you do publicity, and how do you measure the effect of pre-shop publicity? Is it the user ratings on Dianping, or the number of readings on the WeChat official account, or the number of new customers that are attracted to the store?

The above information can help you set the stop loss point.

The stop loss point means that once a certain phenomenon or a series of phenomena occurs, you should arouse a high degree of alertness.

For example, if a shop is unable to make ends meet for six months in a row, does it have to consider changing hands and exiting? This is to set a stop loss point based on time and income.

Another example is that your Dianping’s rating has not been able to go up, and people search for scripts and kill shops. You always rank at the bottom. Does that prove that your word-of-mouth work is not in place? Should you reduce your investment in other channels and start word-of-mouth work first? This is to set the stop loss point according to the marketing effect.

In short, remember one sentence, as long as you have investment, you must have a stop loss point.

You have to set up some landmark events as watersheds, and stop losses in time once they occur. Don't hesitate at this time, you must make decisive decisions. Indecision can only kill yourself in the end.

Whether it’s opening a store or doing other things, I hope everyone can remember this method.

The above is the content of today. When you see here, you should find that I neither agree nor disagree with whether you should be brave to listen to your inner voice.

What I want to say is, listen to any sound, don't let your brain heat up, but calm down for three minutes. No matter what others say, what your parents say, friends encourage you, or colleagues squeeze it, you have to filter it, analyze it, deduct it, and finally draw a new conclusion.

Do what you recognize both emotionally and rationally, instead of following your feelings and getting into the ditch as you go.

I wish everyone a happy life and work, and encourage each other =)

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