What is discipline ?

Discipline is one of the most confused term and has often been used interchangeably with correction and punishment. Discipline is the sum of all the strategy and effort we put into training. It is a systematic method used in preparing a disciple.

In this case our child is our disciple and we want to build them into responsible adults by giving then the needed instructions and skill set. When unwanted habits are picked up, we root them out by correcting them but if it persists, punitive measures could be introduced to reinforce the discipline.

Forms of Discipline

Discipline comes in two basic forms which are the things we say and the examples we show. Mostly because children are still developing their language skills, they tend to see and copy their parents or any strong figure around them. To train this children, we tell them what we expect of them and we show them by our example.
Even at a very young age, we ask them to say "thank you" and we say thank you so they see us doing it.
We teach them how to respond when called by insisting they should say "yes Daddy" or "yes ma'am".

It's not always that easy to train this young minds, especially the hyperactive ones who are always busy. I have been working on teaching my youngest daughter how to tell when she wants to urinate or pass excrements. She is expected to say "Pipi" when she want to wee and Poo-poo when they want to poop.
Even with this, she will sometimes mess the whole place up and the discipline will have to be enforced by some scolding and correcting which involves repeatedly demonstrating how to use the potty for re-enforcement.
My parents trained me to observe and respond to their facial expressions. This helps reduce the need to shout out instructions. A stern graze simply means "stop doing that right now" and using this method when managing the kids in a public place is less annoying.

When rules are broken

Learning to keep rules is part of the discipline and some times this rules are broken or correction is not taken, it leads to some consequences (punishment)

Punishment itself is part of discipline, and can come in a variety of forms which is also dependent on the child's age, level of comprehension and temperament. It could involve:

• Shouting at the child: this works best when delivered by the father, some father's use this effectively when a child needs correction or punishment. It works on my kids for now. Talking them down will work once they are older.
• Taking away a beloved toy: when my girls are not responding to correction, I takeaway their toy as a ponishment for bad behavior. Older kids are highly attached to their cell phones. Taking it away has proved effective for many.
• Shaming a bad behavior: being shamed for a bad behavior is also a strategy used by some parents and teachers
• Spanking: this form of ponishment is very common in my community though the influence of western culture is trying to remove it. Traditionally, spanking is taken to a whole new level where the punishment involves the use of a cane mostly known as corporal punishment.
• Grounding the child: when a child is kept indoors when friends are playing outside is a forme of ponishment that in itself teaches children some amount of self-control.
• some parents and guardian at times went to the extrim with food deprivation, or being taken to the school principal for 24 strokes, being forced to sleep outside,

Why are children punished

Though there have been a drastic change in the way children are ponished this days, when I was young it was very different. A child could be ponished for a variety of confusing reasons. Which I only came to understand latter in life that they were against extrim behaviors.

• For being too excited or being too moody.
• Eating too fast or too slow.
• For interrupting an elderly persons speech.
• For serious offences like stealing and lying.
• Failing at a final examination.
• Refusal to perform assigned tasks.
• Coming home late at night.

Odd Punishments

Some forms of punishment had always felt odd to me and I advice people against such. Asking a child to wash the dishes, sweep the floor or clean the toilet and any other household chores as ponishment results in adults who feel these things are to be avoided.
You will notice it when you ask a child to clean the toilet and the Responce is "what did I do?"

Responce to Discipline and Punishment

When I was younger, it was the collective duty of the community to discipline the kids. When a child is found doing something questionable, any adult had the right to step in and correct the child and the child would accept the correction.
This days where "children are carried for 9 months", even teachers are not allowed to punish the children under their care and neighbors can't even speak loudly at the other neighbor's kids. And as a result, children are 'no more in fear' of other adults and by extension their own parents. They now resent the discipline or correction they are given believing that they have rights and can boldly tell an adult in defiance "you are not my parent".

When it comes to discipline and punishment, our generation did not have any rights, and being carried for 9 months did not count at all. In my opinion, it worked for us. It created responsible adults who did not feel overly entitled believing that the world is revolving around them.

What is the best way out

A child's discipline should involve letting the child understand that their parents have full right and are responsible for their upbringing. And are allowed to use any measure they deem nessesery within the boundary of love to train, correct and enforce the discipline.
No two kids have the same makeup, some of them respond well to verbal correction, others will need more stringent methods. Every child should be disciplined but when it comes to correction and Punishment, each child should be managed according to their temperament. There is 'no one style feet all' when it comes to this topic. Some kids respond to words while others respond to the cane.

Why is discipline important

Children are born with no skill or knowledge needed to survive and parents are expected to provide them with this needed skills and knowledge. Without this, a child grows up unable to fit into the society and has no value to himself and others. For this reason discipline is indispensable.

Having the right motive

Discipline, Correction and Punishment should be administered with love. The motive should be for the child's future benefit and never out of anger or frustration or with the intention to hurt.

Inviting the following to take part in this contest
@kesibliss @gentlesun @emmanuelfavour @emaidoreyin

Picture Credit

All pictures and graphics were captured and edited by manuelhooks using PhotoStudio and remove-bg.

#skidscontest-descipline #steemexclusive #club100 #nigeria