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Tears rolled down my cheeks as I uttered the most painful words I've never said to my mom till this moment.
“ I'm sorry mom, you have to let me go"
I lay lifelessly on the sick bed and watched my family gathered around me. I'm a cancer patient and have been living with it for some years now without my parent's knowledge.
A lump starts growing in my left breâst at the age of 17. I thought it was natural until I began to felt pains.
Sometimes, some liquid substance will be dripping down. For the first time in my life, I was afraid of leaving this world without taking care of my parents.
My mother happiness is mine . I distance myself from friends and I never make attempt to have a soulmate. I'm afraid to fall in love and later leave the love of my life alone in this world to live with pain and agony.
That was my scariest dream.
Mum thought everything was ok with me until I collapsed one day and was rushed to the hospital.
“Ma, her condition has worsened. Why didn't you brought her earlier"
“What did you mean ?"
“Your daughter is suffering from breast cancer and am sorry, we can't help you”
“No!" My mother screamed. I open my eyes and looked at the woman that gave me food when I was hungry. She gave me water when I become thirsty but now she is weeping because of me. I watched in silence.
“ We can't perform the surgery anymore. I'm sorry madam"
“No doctor, please save her. I will look for every means to find the exact money you need . Save my child please” My mother said in between tears.
We made eye contact and the tear I have been trying hard to hold fell down slowly. I know dêath awaits me.
“Child” She said moving closer to me but I cried even more “Please endure, let's wait for miracle. I know my God exist. You wouldn't die but live" my mom said holding my hand, crying hard.
I called this same God when the lump starts developing but he never answered me.
I begged him to heal me but he never answered my prayers. Maybe it is because I am a sinner.
“It too late mum. I'm in so much pain. I failed you. I pictured a great future for us but this is my fate. My existence caused you nothing but pain. I'm so sorry"
“No, don't say that. I love you"
"I'm sorry, the pain is unbearable. You have to let me go please"
"No , doctor! Pls save her. She is my only child. She is dying... Nurse!"
I heard her screams.
I feel her pains.
I waited for the miracle but this is my fate.
©️Josh Writes