"Let's talk!" №27 - "Severity or kindness?" // "Давайте поговорим" №27 - "Строгость или доброта?"

in hive-153018 •  2 years ago 

Hello friends! The comment contest is back! Now we want to invite you to talk about the difficult topic of raising children.

Tell us whether it is worth making concessions to children. For example, you punished them by not allowing them to watch cartoons during the week. However, the child behaves well and asks to cancel the punishment. Should the punishment be lifted? Or should a parent be strict: if a child is punished, should he be punished? Share your opinion and life experience.

Share your opinion in the comments to this post. We will sum up the results on September 22, after 18:00 UTC. The authors of the three most interesting comments receive 1 steem each!

Good luck to all!

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Привет, друзья! Конкурс комментариев снова с вами! Сейчас мы хотим предложить вам поговорить на сложную тему воспитания детей.

Расскажите нам, стоит ли идти детям на уступки. Например, вы их наказали тем, что не разрешаете смотреть мультфильмы в течение недели. Однако ребенок хорошо ведет себя и просит отменить наказание. Надо ли отменять наказание? Или родитель должен быть строгим: если ребенок наказан, то должен нести наказание? Поделитесь своим мнением и жизненным опытом.

Поделитесь своим мнением в комментариях к этому посту. Итоги подведем 22 сентября, после 18:00 UTC. Авторы трех самых интересных комментариев получит по 1 steem!

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Думаю, всё зависит об обстоятельств.

Наказан.
Продолжает - действовать в том же ключе - ни на какие уступки идти нельзя.
Если успокоился и переменилось настроение - можно поторговаться. Хочет то, что запрещают - пусть предложит что-то взамен: общественно-полезные работы, к примеру. Или отжаться 50. Я бы тогда ещё поторговался и выторговал бы ещё уборку комнаты или дополнительные 20 отжиманий (лишние 5 страницй перевода по английскому, лишние задачи в учебнике по физике... ). Не хочет - ну и сам себе злобный Буратино.

...Хотя у меня детей своих нет.
А не своих я знаю с 10-летнего возраста, и их уже бесполезно воспитывать.

Короч, мои методы непоказательны и на практике не применялись. А жена со своими подростками управляется не особо эффективно.

Потому что она их любит). Ей жалко их и принцип , лучше здоровые и счастливые , а не больные и м.б. успешные , но это не точно, еще никто не отменял)

Thanks for everything

Все сильно зависит от ситуации. Я, например , не показатель , но предпочитаю договариваться с детьми, все жду, когда метод сработает, пока не очень эффективно, но надеюсь... У нас нет особых вариантов с наказаниями или лишениями, кроме истории с телефоном, я закрываю часть приложений в их аппаратах кодами, и периодически мониторю содержимое, они находят самые различные способы обходить мои запреты и подбирают пароли). Сейчас вот пришлось дать в школу планшеты , посмотрю , как будет результат , если что тоже закрою там сторонние приложения). Кстати в каникулы у них действует режим послабления и я открываю доступ.
Все же во всем нужна мера, запретами ничего не добьёшься , но и отсутствие их - тоже не вариант, так формируется понимание устройства мира, что некоторые вещи делать не просто нельзя. А запрещено законом.

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This is another good topic to talk about. As parents we punish our children not just because we want to, but because we have to shape them for the future and make them better people.

In my opinion children should be watched by their parents. A parent should observe a child closely to know what kind of character they are developing.

Children seem to act the same but they are all different. Some children are easy to teach and bring up without much punishment, some need to be punished but are easily corrected by it, while some
others need an extra punishment.

In such a situation you should work with the kind of character the child is coming up with. Some children may change for that period just to get you to lift the punishment and the moment you lift it and turn your back, they go back to that same thing you punished them for.

The fact that the child is the one asking you to lift it is tricky. If you saw the good attitude and decide to lift,, it is ok. But when the child seems to have changed and is asking you to lift it, you should not be quick to lift it without much observation, being that it's not a very difficult punishment. With much observation of your children as a parent you will know when the punishment you gave them has yielded some results.

As parents we punish our children not just because we want to, but because we have to shape them for the future and make them better people.

I truly believe this statement is very important. What parents mean by shaping their children? Making them a better individual for the society? that's accurate. As a matter of fact have any single parent ever considered to make their small humans a better individual for themselves and not for others.
The best thing I read this week on internet was;

we always tell our kids "I'm proud of you, you did a good job", "Moms proud of you!" and they get so used to this statement, that they spend their whole life trying to make others proud and not them. Instead why don't we tell them "you did a good job, be proud on yourself. and this is just >>

Also I trust, don't punish them this much that they get used to it. Teach them with love after all you spent 30 years on this planet but still are half empty, we can't expect from those tiny humans to be full. They learn what they see, try to understand them, and not make them understand.

  ·  2 years ago (edited)

Yes there comes a time when we will not be there to make decisions for them and they will have to make decision based on what we have instilled in them.Most times in life you do not just do what you want to because your decision can seem good to you but would affect others negatively. That's why if you must punish a child then it has to be for the best. I did not understand when my parents punished me when I was little, but today I am grateful to them because it shaped me. One day they will be grateful to you. You must also be cautious, that's why I said know the kind of child you have so you will know the extent of punishment to give them.After punishing my kids I talk to them and make them understand that I am doing it because I love them.

I totally understand your point kids should be taught life, but i will be happy if you agree with me that only 1% of kids deserve punishment and that they will learn a lot from their life in future. We can't teach everything somethings are to be learnt while you grow up.

Yes they do learn while growing up.but they may learn it the hard way then. So why not save them the stress.

However, the child behaves well and asks to cancel the punishment. Should the punishment be lifted? Or should a parent be strict: if a child is punished, should he be punished? Share your opinion and life experience.

Either the mother or the father must be strict with the children so that the children can distinguish between right and wrong and if they do something wrong, they fear that if we do it, our father or mother will be angry with us. or will punish us. This is very important to implement on them for their betterment. If they realize their mistake after getting punishment then we have to treat them politely So that the children do not get angry with us too.

It is actually wired to except a child to be disciplined. Kids will do what their mind will trigger, they are brainless. Making mistakes is obviously a common face of life. We learn with time.

Tell us whether it is worth making concessions to children.

A very simple rule, if your kid made a mistake and since you punished them (which is actually not accurate, it is important not to take any such inhuman acts not even smallest punishments. One, teach them the right way with politeness, once twice or thrice. Two your little angel is stubborn and now you are punishing them, by not allowing them to watch cartoons) and if they are sorry I truly believe they deserve to watch Cartoons then.
Rare case your kid know how to play too.