The days are slowly getting better. I am not talking about the weather, I am talking about my current situation, status, and mental health. Things are slowly coming together in time. I remember when I crossed the border of Ukraine, I was so broken and devastated that I never thought I can recover from that emotion and feeling by myself. But now I am not living at that moment. I am still broken inside but that emotion is not so strong as before, I think time and surroundings are helping me to recover.It's been around 1 month and 8 days I have been staying in the Netherlands and I must confess, this is really a beautiful country. I also liked Poland a lot but I couldn't enjoy the moment there. Due to my unstable mental condition and traumatic situation, I haven't seen Poland thoroughly. I was having PTSD and I was not ready to accept my broken world at all. The war scar was fresh and the entire displacement situation I couldn't accept so easily.I work on myself in fact every day little by little I am working on myself. I don't know how many people I hurt at that moment when I was in that broken situation. I guess I was kinda rude at that moment. Every morning I look at myself and ask myself do I wanna stay like this always or am I ready to move forward? I accepted my fate and destiny, probably this is the place where my destiny is. I don't know yet...
Refugee Life:I hate to call myself a refugee but this is my reality. I never knew how tough refugee life can be until I had to experience it on my own. It's hard and sometimes full of shame. I feel ashamed and feel guilty to call myself a refugee but I am forced to be like this. Because of the Political propaganda, because of that one man, the war started and, therefore, here I am by losing almost everything except my life. I have got a lot of help and support so far from the people of Poland and the Netherlands. That made my life journey a little bit easier.My present lifestyle is very limited but I really appreciate it. Somehow this critical time taught me how to appreciate every bit of life's moments. I feel this due to this war, people learned to appreciate small things in life and learned to stay connected with each other. I feel good when I talk to people and now it becomes part of my life. I talk to almost all the people who are in the shelter and try to stay connected. Everyday life is almost the same, I start my day around 7.00 am nowadays. My life routine changed a lot after the war. After getting ready normally I do breakfast while Gigi does her breakfast too. Then I take her for the morning walk and generally she loves this moment. This is almost everyday activity but after that, normally I do finish some work that is required.Slowly things are coming together and helping me to build life step by step. I won't say this is the life I wanna live but I would say whatever help and support I am getting was beyond my imagination. My way of seeing a life changed a lot and now I don't expect anything from life. I am not hopeless, my circumstances are now different and I accepted living in them.My bank card finally arrived and I am so happy about that. I have taken an appointment with the municipality here and after that, I hope I will be able to do transactions through the card. I haven't set up and haven't connected my card with anything. On Monday I am going to the Municipality and after that will go to the bank. Every month, for now, I will get 50 euros, which is almost nothing but I will manage life within 50 euros as I have shelter/ a place to live. I have been managing everything so far so I believe in the future I will also be able to manage my expenses.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit