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in hive-166850 •  2 years ago  (edited)

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looking back

I have been disillusioned with my university's care. I had an altercation with one of my roommates; she attacked me and by reflex, I defended myself. since it wasn't the first time, she had jumped on me, I thought, "hey! I cannot take this anymore and like sheep, went to report to the lecturer in charge of our hostel.
he directed me to the dean of students to file a report. I did.
that was the mistake! trusting that he had my best interests at heart or something. I wonder what's in his chest.

well, what my ignorant ass didn't know was that, in this university, "we don't fight" that's the rule. no matter whether you are attacked, you're supposed to be Jesus and not fight back. and after you've been beaten, do not think reporting will get you out. that's the bit they don't tell you about. as long as you were involved in the fight, any punishment that's supposed to happen, you would be included in the receipt.

looking forward

if you see your attacker coming, run! if they jumped on you before you could do that, fight but under no circumstances should you report? I would have recommended the police but seeing as we're in Ghana, I'm distrustful of their "help" and hope you would be too.

I have regrets, for reporting but this has been a learning opportunity too. lessons have been learnt. Tact here means lying your head off to make someone feel better about themselves. if you say your truth, you're disrespectful. I guess all that Religious and Moral Education was a waste. at least when it comes to dealing with authorities who are not your parents and do not care about you. Protect yourself, only you and God can anyhow.

I have had the opportunity to have some deep calming conversations which have helped me to tone down the hate towards the attacker. I have her in my room for the next two weeks, as far as I know. I get to practice restraint when my mouth would rather go, and my meditation sessions have become more meaningful. those are the plusses.

I have come to realise I didn't understand the "accepting Christ as your lord and personal Saviour" thing. now I'm getting it.

May peace be with you? say a prayer for me. will you?

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It sounds to me that dean tricked you and didn't do his job. Once again the attacker (bully) goes free. Did they punish you?!
It feels as if it is a worldwide trend punishing victims and rewarding bad behaviour. What exactly is the dean his job?

I was made to sign a bond of good behaviour. Lesson learnt. No reporting fights.