Few minutes of mistake

Good day beautiful people of steemit. I hope you all are doing great.
Whenever I remember the experience, tears won't stop flowing in my eyes because I don't think of ever forgiving myself. Have tried severally to forget everything and face the future but my heart is at pieces
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. Some people will always ask me, why are you always on your own? Why don't you like playing around? You have entirely changed from your normal self, you no longer the stubborn girl I know,why? Why this why that? I will just keep quiet to all these questions but this is the best time to tell the world whoever cares to read the reason for all these change of attitude.
I was known for my extrovert nature, am a noisy type, when you tell me that you are not in the mood to play, that is when I will disturb you more. Am not that good girl am not a bad girl, am just in the middle.
Sonia was my best friend, at the to the best of my knowledge,we have been friends for 5 years. She is so quiet, she is so good, she tolerate my excesses, she do advise me of my bad nature but I do laugh it away and never take any of her advice. We entered the same secondary school and our bond grew more. She been the intelligent type help me out in my assignment and academics but as the notorious type am never learning.
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During our mid term break in my senior secondary two.

On February 21st 2015(sobbing) a day I shall never forget in my life. I was excorting Sonia to the main road because she visited. With my playful nature I was disturbing her and doing nasty annoying things to her but she was not in the and she warned me to allow her be . I took off her cap and threw it and it fell on the road, I ran away so that she won't see me and hid. After like 3 mins, I heard a loud noise and I came out to Know the cause of the noise. I saw people gathered on the road, I sneak into the crowd to know what was going on, behold my best friend lying in a pool of blood. God!!! tears was all over my eyes I held her crying,asking her not to leave me. She was struggling to say something, I listened carefully and she told me ' I forgive you my best friend, please don't blame yourself it wasn't your fault, it is an accident, please try to change from your notorious life, I love you' in a mild voice and she gave up after her last word. I cried and cried asking people to help me. A good samaritan came with his car and took her to the hospital,but it was too late, she is dead, said the doctor. I wailed and wailed, crying on top of my voice but crying can't bring back a dead person.
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Sonia went to the road to pick up her cap on the road, thinking that there was no vehicle coming, a car on high speed hit her and ran away. That was how I lost my best friend and sister. Can I ever forgive myself again?.
That was the reason for my total change of behaviour,no matter how I try to forget it's still indelible in my heart. It was a FEW MINUTES OF MISTAKE that If I had listened to the warning of my best friend Sonia , to leave her she wouldn't have been dead by now.
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If I have avoided this few minutes of mistake, all these wouldn't have happened.#weeps#
Thank you all for reading my story