True Love
Is there anything that could be called true love?
If the purpose of courtship and relating to someone is to find a partner, then it could be said that those who are looking for a partner are looking for true love. But what is love, and how to know when it has been achieved? How do you know if it will last forever once you think you find it?
When you bond sentimentally with someone, it will usually focus you, only on one aspect of love: Romantic Love.
Romantic Love
source
Dr. Larry A. Buen has identified the characteristics of romantic love. It mentions a series of traits that may encompass the behavior of some individual, among others it mentions:
Intense
passion
Loss of self-judgment
Obsessive
dedication to
the loved one
Desire for exclusivity
Self-centered concern
Selective attention to
positive qualities
Exaggeration of real or adjudicated qualities
Use of secret codes
Use of private meanings and special language
How you can see Romantic Love is not a firm foundation on which to establish a relationship. If the relationship is to be satisfying and to survive the test of time, Committed Love must replace Romantic Love.
Committed Love
source
Committed love acts very differently from romantic love. Committed love focuses less of its attention on itself, and focuses more outward. The characteristics of committed love are also varied in nature.
Balance in shared
needs
Focus directed towards others
Realistic values and expectations
Tolerance
Desire to make yourself known
Freedom to express all your emotions
Transcendence of two different beings linked in a single identity.
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