'You got thinner!'

in hive-174578 •  5 years ago 

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'You got thinner!'
Ah, the comment about our weight!

It's one of the things that you say to someone that could potentially offend them or make them conscious about themselves. It's the same with the 'You got fat! comments.

For someone who always struggles with their self-image, they might prefer not to hear those.

I don't mind those.



I've been skinny my whole life. It could be because of genes + fast metabolism + my lifestyle (I don't eat much). All my life I've struggled to put on weight, not because I don't like that I look like a stick, but because I am literally underweight and it concerns me. I mean, looking like a stick is not good either but I'd be more concerned about me being underweight and not having enough nourishment.

Since childhood, my parents have made me take vitamins and supplements for me to put on weight. Believe me, I tried. But I'm still underweight lol. As a kid, I've always had trips to the hospital and every time they take my weight, it's always the same, or have little improvements.

Even though I struggle with putting on weight, receiving comments about it is fine with me. Like earlier, I went to see my friend who I've never seen in a month and she told me I got thinner and asked how I was. She was surprised by how fast I lost some weight, and I was too lol.

Hearing comments about my weight makes me realize what I have been currently doing. If it's very noticeable that I got thinner, that means I starve myself again without me noticing it. It means I am in a depressive state again. And that means I have to look over myself again and change some things.

If I got comments of me getting more weight, I'd be happy cos that means I've been doing fine.

So, throw any comments about it at me and I won't mind.



BUT


Be careful of doing it to somebody else, though.

Here's the thing:

Some of them probably are struggling with their weight and are conscious of how they look like especially women (hello, beauty standards the society is pressuring us) and they probably are aware of it. I know some people who get sad when someone notices their weight, and we don't want that.

I mean, for sure, the commenter might be even just telling that because he/she is concerned about the person and it's probably just an innocent mistake for them to randomly talk about stuff.


But it's just a weight! He's still handsome even if he got skinny!

It might be just a thing for most, but to some, it's their everything. Different things affect differently for different people. And everyone should respect that. It's best to be sensitive and wait for the person to open up the subject. Not judge them based on how they react to things.

After all, we are humans and we have different experiences.


Stay nice to everyone!

Except to those motherfuckers who hoard alcohols, hand sanitizers, face masks, and toilet papers and sell them for 25x the normal price in times of crisis (like now, covid-19 crisis). They deserve to rot on earth. Spit on those who take advantage.

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like the side view, next time lower the pic a bit

Here is my take on this:
You get that comment from another point of view. This means different world and lifestyle. the image and looks are just the out come of how we live, so we can't just throw something like ''you got fat''! That is as ignorant as it can possibly get. The underlying reasons are a lot and we are not the ones to comment on those. Love is what we need right now.
To love is to reach god. -Rumi

Yahh. I know some might just be saying that innocently and they didn't mean any harm, but it's important to be cautious.

Yeah! We need to grow up and start caring for the feelings of other people in a deeper level. But the diet systems and activity rates of people have got to change. Many people are suffering from the complications of food abundance and lack of physical activity in life. ;/ </3

There are 2 things I suggest you start doing.

Smoke or eat weed to regulate your appetite

Start lifting weights (no cardio, trying to gain weight here)

You will build healthy lean mass which support your bones and immune system for years to come

Reply back with any issues you may have, I don’t mind talking things out with you and sharing some experiences that might help you achieve your goals.

Weed is illegal here, I'd wait til it becomes legal til I could take them. I heard it relieves anxiety. Oh I am into weights again just last week! :D I did workout last year and I gained weight even when it was Muay Thai (cardio) lol I enjoyed it but I had to stop cos I need to focus on spending my money on art materials. I wanna go back again when things get better. :D Thanks for the suggestions!

As open as I am to the idea of weed and its legality (among others), I just don't get along with it. It makes me very anxious and uncomfortable every time. I think this is because it tends to... slow your brain down and leave you a bit dopey. This is a great feeling presumably for most people, but for me, most stimulants and depressants affecting the 'pace' of my brain tends to bother me deeply, be it weed, alcohol, coffee or whatever.

Add to that the spins when you've smoked too much, that are kind of like when you've drank too much... I pass every time.

Personally I don't think you're missing much at all =)

Oh, I haven't tried it yet, but it's interesting. I for sure don't like the effect of alcohol especially the spinning part (I hate it) but I still would give it a try at least.

Oh for sure. My momma always used to say 'try anything once' =D (if you get the type that makes you hyper and giggly, that can be fun)

I think what's important is to be healthy. I need to eat healthier.

Yeah.. but being underweight is not healthy, or at least, I'm at risk for some health problems in the future. You go eat healthy foods!

You look great!

Thanks!

You look great 👍 and I love that last part of your post. Damn hoarders.

Thank you! Yeah, those people are the worst!

What a great body you have there!

Looking good!

very very good picture

Totally agree with your words, have faced that my whole life. Also must say, you're beautiful and look gorgeous!

Weight is the thing that is super sensitive, regardless if someone is really skinny or really big. I used to get made fun of a lot when I was a kid for it ( kind of weird since most of America is fat as hell, and we probably have the most diet products ever). But I think the worst even as an adult is being judged my parents or people from my ethnic background home country ( The Philippines). It's like they have no filter when saying a comment which I feel is really rude and some people take really personal.

I have a friend who is bigger but not exactly fat. She just has a bigger build then the average Filipino girl ( shoulders, quad muscles etc. She could prob kick a girls ass to be honest.) But she hates going back to the Philippines because they are very judgmental about it. At the end of the day though I think someone who judges that harshly has nothing else good to share. So in your case, I think its best to just stray away a bit from those people and hang out with people that are more supportive. There is a big difference in suggesting " hey I've been eating more veggies and doing a little walk in the morning and it makes a big difference" to someone who wants to loose weight or " I've been just eating more meals with higher caloric intake but keeping it healthy" then just saying .. " You should eat something, You'll be look better". Or " eat less and You'll look so handsome". It's also funny cause its more then likely aunts or family members who say this, are not in too good of shape as well. And what is worse is sometimes their children carry the same methodology of thinking and start touting the same things smh.

It's like they have no filter when saying a comment which I feel is really rude and some people take really personal.

This is so fucking true. I am a Filipino and I live here, and it's such a shame that most Filipinos do this. Whatever you do, they will always have a comment about everything about you even though it's none of their business. They don't really care or "concerned" about you, they just want to say something and hopefully drag you down. Really toxic. They will even try to force you to live your life with how they want it, especially the relatives.

I'm sorry for what you've been through. It's terrible.

yeah =( well now we are in isolation cause of this virus so I guess time for some peace. Enough of that Crab mentality

you're sexy, and about weight everything is individual, more important not just what they say to you, but how you feel in your weight

True, thanks!

  ·  5 years ago (edited)

You could try my patented diet! Go to graduate school while simultaneously working nights, so you have a permanent sleep deficit of about 20 hours a week while subsisting on nothing but chocolate and coffee. I think I gained like 15 kilos in a year!

(I'm kidding, never ever subject yourself to that)

WHUT? You gained weight for that??? That's what I do literally everyday and I just lose weight lol. They even said more sleep will make you gain weight but nothing happened to me. But well, it's different for everyone lol

Haha, maybe I eat more chocolate than you :D Maybe you should exchange some of the chocolate for carrots, and see if you get a paradoxical reaction ^_^

I know what you mean, though - my ability to gain or shred weight have changed wildly through time. I have been on the full journey being a veritable stick man (50-60 kg) in my 20's, until after graduate school where I started balooning until finally coming dangerously close to 90 kilos a couple of years ago, which prompted me to embark on a regime of exercise and change of diet that shaved almost 20 kilos off of me, which is where I am today.

just amazing you look so well and fit

Thanks! "Fit" isn't the right term though but hopefully I will if I gain more weight.