This is the story of Esther told in my own words.

Part One
Part Two
Part Three

THE WICKED PLOT

Haman (boo!) convinced the king into issuing a decree that on a certain day (determined by “purim”) all the loyal people of the king’s land should attack and kill and plunder all the people of Israel. The king wanted to make sure his rules were followed, so Haman (boo!) wrote a letter to all 127 provinces in the king’s name:

I am the great Akav-sheriff of Persia, the great king. My wise and stunningly handsome advisor and I control all the civilized earth, all 127 provinces from India to Ethiopia. (There is nothing but a cultural wasteland outside of here). We’ve always dealt with this unimaginable wealth and power with care, not allowing ourselves to become maniacal or evil, but rather moderate and steady. We have set forth many rules to keep peace and order in our land. We are known for our humane treatment of our citizens and strictly enforce our rules to ensure our national security.

Recently, we have been informed of a national security threat to our great civilization. There is a race of people (the Jewish Zionists) who claim to follow a foreign god who has a set of rules that at times are contrary to our great rules of civil order. As king, I have been advised by my wise and handsome and magnificent councilor Haman, to whom I always defer, that the best way to address this latest security threat, is to eradicate these terrorists from our midst. They commit the worst of crimes, they refuse to follow the rules of order that have been made by the great Akav-sheriff, by the advice of wise Haman the Agagite, of the Amalekites (may their names be blotted out).

Therefore, we decree that every noble in every province shall all together with all their civilians utterly destroy the Zionist enemy by the sword, showing no mercy or pity upon them, thus saving our great civilization. We have decreed that the 13th or 14th of Adar this year should be the date of this purge, since the magnificent Haman has selected according to his magical purim, which are never wrong. That will give these Zionist Jews plenty of time to get their affairs in order before we send them to the depths of sheol. Delivered and signed in the seal of the great, Akav-Sheriff and his wise advisor Haman the magnificent.

Now to make sure this devious and wicked plot would happen, Haman (boooo!) promised to put a lot of money (I mean a lot of money) into the treasury to reward the citizens who would participate in this evil plan. Government subsidies and tax breaks for the murder and plundering of their fellow man. Oh. That means money from Haman (boo!) and the plunder and spoil from the Jews… citizens all throughout the kingdom who loved money (more than people) would actually go through with this! For real!

Oh no, this is serious!

THE SALVATION PLAN

When MORDECAI heard about this decree and the money (he did spend a lot of time at the city gates after all), he was pretty upset. He got his hands on a copy of the letter and stained it with tears.

He put on sackcloth and ashes and walked around the city crying out to God that they may be delivered. But the king had a rule that nobody could wear sackcloth and ashes at the city gate, so MORDECAI wasn’t allowed to judge at the city gate dressed like that. When Queen Ester heard about this, she sent nice clothes for MORDECAI to wear, so he could get back to work (he was a very righteous judge after all), but MORDECAI refused and continued crying out to God in sack cloths and ashes. He knew how serious this was.

Ester became curious. “Why is MORDECAI refusing to put on normal cloths? Why is he crying out to God? This sounds serious!” she said to herself. So she sent messengers to MORDECAI to find out what this sackcloth and ashes thing is all about.

Then MORDECAI saw that God was answering his prayers! He had someone on the “inside”. You know what I mean. Surely the queen could convince the king to reverse this decree!

So MORDECAI explained the situation to Hadassah and told her about all the money promised (it was a LOT of money) and he sent her a copy of the letter. She gasped in horror as she realized that this is a very serious situation. This will actually happen and we even know the date!

(Remember, it was the 13th or 14th of Adar… hey is that why we celebrate Purim on these days? Why do we celebrate such an awful day? Let’s keep reading to find out!)

Posted via neoxian.city | The City of Neoxian