Rating: 4/5
AKA: The Shining 2: Peter Frampton – Live Samurai!!!
Watch Here: https://www.bitchute.com/video/mGLVVJO4zKrk/
I said “GODAMN! You Ain’t Ready Pleb!”
YOU
ARE
NOT
READY!
When we discovered this movie, it shocked us to our collective core. Not at the quality of which it was filmed, but the revelations of what this movie is really about.
It’s basically the reincarnated spirit of Peter Frampton VS. The surviving members of the Torrance clan from The Shining. Oh and Rupert from survivor is here as well.
What’s that? You’re calling our bullshit?
Fuck you, we’re about to prove all these points here in just a bit. So sit back and calm the heck down pal.
First a little background.
In 1978, a story was given out that the singing sensation Peter Frampton was involved a horrible automobile accident and badly injured.
That’s crap brothers, the truth is Peter Frampton was a distinguished marital artist who trained with the likes of fellow reviewers Schlong Long, Drunken Master as well as the illustrious Terry Silver.
Actual Photo of Terry Silver, Drunken Master & Schlong Long
Anyway I won’t go in to the whole story of what happened, suffice it to say that Peter got a big head, did some crazy shit, and it took the combined strength of Drunken Master & Schlong Long to put him down like the bitch he was.
It was fucking sick, like worse than Anakin Skywalker being immolated. He was dead, d-e-a-d, or so we all thought.
Fast forward to 2022 where, after a rigorous marathon of drinking & jujitsu, Prince Pectorals comes up with a winning idea: “Hey gang, let’s watch Blood Beat & chill!”
We popped this sucker in and realized that not only had Peter Frampton survived, but he had somehow manifested himself into the body of young girl, morphed her into a Samurai, & attempted to soul suck his “sister's” powers ala Wendy Torrance from The Shining; to obtain immortality.
At least we think that’s what the fuck is going on. All I know is that it looks like Wendy Torrance is going by Cathy now, and is dating Rupert from Survivor see for yourself:
….and apparently Wendy had a daughter named Dolly. Looks like everyone decided to change their name for this “movie” could be for a lot of different reasons.
Maybe they were afraid Jack Torrance would come a courting if he escaped the OverLook Hotel from The Shining.
Doesn’t matter, they’re here and have to fight for their unified hot shit asses.
REVIEW
So essentially Gary AKA Rupert is dating Cathy, and they are both expecting Cathy’s children Ted, AKA Danny & Dolly AKA Pure Sex, home for Christmas.
Well wouldn’t ya know it, Ted also brings his doofy, whiney, flat out useless main squeeze of a girlfriend Sarah with him.
This bitch is who Peter Frampton, possesses, & reincarnates, I don’t even know.
What I do know is that this whole family loves hunting and being outdoors. It’s pretty cool.
However Sarah, can’t hang with the big dogs and wants to cry, and act weird about the families favorite pastime/bonding function.
Sarah's also some sort of psychic, along with, you guessed it everyone else in the family aside from Gary.
That’s right pleb, every single one of these freaks has “The Shining”. They can move shit, stand in place like a Dragon Ball Z anime and power up to Super Wisconsin Hunter Level 5.
I mean here is a use of that power here:
And Here:
Word of advice plebs, if you are dating a girl, make sure 1, she’s not some reincarnated evil force of a low tier singing "sensation" & 2, that she enjoys and supports our family values.
For example, this bitch, Sarah hates hunting as we said before. Well, the rest of the family is straight up down with it, aside from Cathy, but I think she was just having a bad day during the scene where she seems upset.
Anyway one of the coolest members of this family is called “The Red Baron AKA Uncle Pete” I really thought this cat was gonna be the balls to the walls hero of this piece.
I mean if you see the way he’s introduced you think, oh man this guy is gonna be awesome. Check it out below:
"Red Baron to Lone Painter!"
Fucking let down fam as he’s only in the film for just a little bit.
Anyways one night while seemingly being fucked by the ghost of Peter Fampton (youl'l know it when you see it), Sarah witnesses the killings of Uncle Pete and a few townsfolk, not to mention some random Hunters.
Hell, she even orgasms during the killings while having sex with Ted.
I guess he was happy, but it was overkill for this movie. Basically, this poster sums it up, literally a direct scene:
So I know what you’re asking, how the fuck do we know this movie and The Shining are connected, to include Peter Frampton’s resurrection?
First like we showed you earlier "Cathy" is a dead ringer for Wendy Torrance. She also has a severe disposition about being "married again" and keeps Gary in the dating zone despite his eagerness to take their relationshp to the next level.
Second Listen to this fucking Samurai talk, it sounds just like Peter Frampton when he sings:
"Your Power Cannot Help You!"
Some of you may not know who Peter Frampton is, and that’s good, but take a listen to his “Show me the Way” song. You’ll see what we mean:
Ya see?
Peter Frampton, Samurai essentially kills everyone but Ted & Dolly, who summon up their super psychic gobbledygook powers to erase him/her (I don't even know at this point) from existence, thus ending his reign of terror forever.
You may have seen all that from the clip, but I thought you might want to know in case you’re a lazy fuck.
FINAL WORD –
MRHELLBOX – Super happy Frampton is dead, now some of you might do a Google search and say “Bitch, he’s alive!” Trust me, it’s not him. They cloned his bitch ass and kept just the “musical talent” aspect of him. See how well that worked out?
Just to reiterate, don’t bring a bitch home that is anti-everything you and your family love, it just never works.
Before I forget, check out Nervous Curtains remix of the Blood Beat score, its fucking epic – 4/5
SCHLONG LONG – We killed that fool and killed him good. Not sure how he was able to come back, has to be something with that Shining power those Torrance kids are invoking.
Just for the record, I’d have babies rolling out of Dolly’s ass like an assembly line. Super HAWT – 5/5
DRUNKEN MASTER – Look we fucked up Frampton because the lotto ticket I traded him for Schlitz ended being the equivalent to getting every single digit on a PowerBall in today’s world. Bitch wouldn’t share, had to 86 his punk ass.
Fuck Frampton! – 4/5
PRINCE PECTORALS – No one is gonna deep dive into the exquisite way “GARY” hunts? Dude got himself a Sony Walkman and just takes down a deer while jamming out to classical music.
That’s how you flex boys. Too bad about Uncle Pete, maybe we’ll get a prequel where it’s just 90 minutes of Gary & Pete jamming out and hunting, I’d crowdfund that sit myself. – 5/5