"WHO can find a VIRTUOUS and CAPABLE WIFE? SHE IS MORE PRECIOUS THAN RUBIES."
Proverbs 31:10 (NLT)
13 A foolish child is a calamity to a father; A QUARRELSOME WIFE IS AS ANNOYING AS CONSTANT DRIPPING.
14 Fathers can give their sons an inheritance of houses and wealth,
BUT ONLY THE LORD CAN GIVE AN UNDERSTANDING WIFE."
Proverbs 19:13,14 (NLT)
• As a wife in the home, pettiness and other negative attitudes, which might be meant to spite your spouse; would later have a wrong impact on your children (Proverbs 14:1).
- Children becoming good; in characters, attitudes, and being well-behaved, depend largely, or mainly on who the wife of a man is—the mother of those children: "A WORTHY WIFE IS A CROWN FOR HER HUSBAND, BUT A DISGRACEFUL WOMAN IS LIKE CANCER IN HIS BONES" (Proverbs 12:4 NLT).
READ: Proverbs 19:14 - Children tend to think or behave, or incline and be endeared to their mother
and take after her—emulate her. - If you are reading this piece, and you are a wife, living with a husband, and a mother with the children; I want you to pay attention to your Christian life. How you live your Christian life before your children.
- If you live contrary to the Bible, as a wife and a mother, that may have an adverse effect—a negative and unpleasant effect on your children.
- The father also has a role to play as the head of the family, the children needs his presence at home to build and form certain characters in their lives. HOWEVER, the larger percentage of influence comes from the mothers—especially at the early childhood stage.
- What or who a child turns out to be, is by and large caused by the influence of the woman at home—the mother.
• It could be seen that some of the children who turned out to be good, and become an instrument of honour in the hands of God, in the Bible; had the contributions of their mothers, which were immense in whom they become.
- Examples were: Moses (Exodus 2:1-10); Samuel (1 Samuel 1:20-28); Timothy (Acts 16:1,2); and others.
- Timothy's mother and grandmother made a great impact in his life:
"When I call to REMEMBRANCE THE GENUINE FAITH THAT IS IN YOU [Timothy], WHICH DWELT FIRST IN YOUR GRANDMOTHER LOIS AND YOUR MOTHER EUNICE, AND I AM PERSUADED IS IN YOU ALSO" (2 Timothy 1:5 NKJV).
"AND THAT FROM CHILDHOOD YOU [Timothy] HAVE KNOWN THE HOLY SCRIPTURES, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus."
2 Timothy 3:15 (NKJV)
• And some who turned out to be wayward, became the children of Belial; we also could see that the contributions of their mothers were lacking.
- Examples:
(i) The sons of Eli were wayward (1 Samuel 2:12). We could notice that nothing was recorded as per the contribution of their mother on their lives.
(ii) Likewise the children of Samuel, nothing was mentioned about their mother also (1 Samuel 8:1-5).
(iii) The children of David who were weird: Absalom who plotted a coup to topple his father's government (2 Samuel 15:10-14); Adonijah who exalted himself to be King (1 Kings 1:5-10); Amnon who raped his half-sister, Tamar (2 Samuel 13:1-14); nothing was recorded about the mothers of these children, what they did or contributed to the shaping of their lives and characters. - Solomon did mention about the contributions of his mother in agreement or collaboration with the father in shaping his life (Proverbs 4:3,4). The contributions of his mother was instrumental to his enthronement, the succeeding of his father (1 Kings 1:11-40).
EVEN though, she could be considered an offender (1 Kings 1:21), a woman who came into the family through adulterous act (2 Samuel 11:2-5,27), yet, she did pay attention to the growth and success of her son (Proverbs 4:3,4). - We could also see the contributions of one King Lemuel's mother in Proverbs 31:
1 THE WORDS of King Lemuel, THE UTTERANCE which his MOTHER TAUGHT HIM:
2 WHAT, MY SON? And what, SON OF MY WOMB? And what, SON OF MY VOWS? 3 Do not give your strength to women, Nor your ways to that which destroys kings. 4 It is not for kings, O Lemuel, It is not for kings to drink wine, Nor for princes intoxicating drink; 5 Lest they drink and forget the law, And pervert the justice of all the afflicted. 6 Give strong drink to him who is perishing, And wine to those who are bitter of heart. 7 Let him drink and forget his poverty, And remember his misery no more. 8 Open your mouth for the speechless, In the cause of all who are appointed to die. 9 Open your mouth, judge righteously, And plead the cause of the poor and needy" (Proverbs 31:1-9 NKJV).
• If a woman does not have the fear of God, and does not live by the principles of the Bible, that would have a negative impact on the children of such—even if the husband, who is their father, lives right (Proverbs 31:30).
- The lapses of the woman, the mother of those children, would still show or be seen in their lives and characters. That largely determines what such children turn out to be in life.
- We have seen a number of children whose fathers are not godly, who do not know God at all, but with the contributions and faith of their mothers, they turned out to be good and Great in life (Acts 16:1,2; 1 Corinthians 7:13,14).
- Whereas, in the situation or a case where the man is godly, but the woman and mother of the children is not, and no contribution or support from such a mother in shaping the children's characters.
- That is, Godly characters are not found in the life of such a mother—it might be difficult for those children to follow the way of God: "CHARM is DECEPTIVE, AND BEAUTY does not LAST; BUT A WOMAN WHO FEARS THE LORD WILL BE GREATLY PRAISED" (Proverbs 31:30 NLT).
- Raising godly children by a man, when the wife, the mother of those children, is not living by the principles of the Bible, could be a hard work and might be difficult for the man.
• If a man does not know God, and the wife does, the children could still turn out to be godly and become great in life (Acts 16:1,2). BUT if a man is godly, and the wife is not; it could be difficult for the children in that family to walk in the way of God.
- The children's affinity with their mothers tends to be stronger or could be stronger, especially when they are still tender in age.
- It is when they have grown-up to know the difference between the good and the bad, that such children would be drifted to their father. That is, when they began to see the lapses of their mother, which at times may have been too late to correct or change, or right some of the wrongs, and the negative things which they had imbibed or cultivated from such a mother.
• It is my prayer that you will not fail in your marriage, and not regret later in life, in Jesus' name.
Peace!
TO BE CONTINUED