21.1.2022 - Joke or funny story of the day | Witz oder lustige Geschichte des Tages

in hive-199722 •  3 years ago 

Here you can post a joke every day that you particularly liked.

We all want to have a little fun and since the group is a little international, we might find out what people in other countries are laughing about.

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Since it is no longer a problem to simply translate texts, you can also publish them here in German, English or Spanish.

The best joke will be rewarded every day with a slightly higher vote. But every participant also gets a few cents for publishing a joke.

So, let's get started, I'm looking forward to reading jokes or funny gas stories from all over the world here.

Hier könnt ihr jeden Tag einen Witz veröffentlichen, der euch besonders gefallen hat.

Wollen wir doch alle ein wenig Spaß haben und da die Gruppe ja ein wenig international aufgestellt ist, erfahren wir vielleicht worüber man in anderen Ländern so lacht.

Da es heute ja kein Problem mehr ist, texte einfach zu übersetzen könnt ihr hier auch in deutsch, englisch oder spanisch veröffentlichen.

Der beste Witz wird jeden Tag mit einem etwas höheren Vote honoriert. Aber jeder Teilnehmer bekommt auch so ein paar Cent, dass er einen Witz veröffentlicht.

Also, dann mal los, ich freue mich schon darauf Witze oder lustige Gasschichten aus aller Welt hier zu lesen.

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3 years ago by

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      ·  3 years ago 

    Why can't a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot."

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    2 votes
    [-]
      ·  3 years ago 

    There comes a time when living becomes something like a competition, when one shamelessly rejoices over the death of one's neighbour, as if he were a rival who has been eliminated. - Pierre Magnan

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    2 votes
    [-]
      ·  3 years ago 

    Knock! Knock!

    Who’s there?
    Control Freak.
    Con…
    OK, now you say, “Control Freak who?”

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    3 votes
    [-]
      ·  3 years ago 

    الزوجة : لماذا تحمل صورتي دائماً وتذهب بها إلى العمل؟
    الزوج: حين تواجهني مشكلة مهما كانت صعوبتها فحينها انظر لصورتك وتنحل المشكلة مباشرة.
    الزوجة: أترى كم أنا مهمه بالنسبة لك.
    الزوج: نعم … انظر إلى صورتك وأخبر نفسي: (لن تكون هناك مشكلة أكبر من تلك)

    Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
    Hubby: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your
    picture and the problem disappears.
    Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
    Hubby: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, “What other problem can
    there be greater than this one?”

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    2 votes
    [-]
      ·  3 years ago 

    What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
    I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.

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    3 votes
    [-]
      ·  3 years ago 

    – Boss, I want a raise. Know the gentleman who has three companies behind me.

    • Which?
      – Water, electricity and telephone.

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      1 vote
      [-]
        ·  3 years ago 

      Normally you have news, weather and travel. But not on snow day. On a snow day, the news is weather is travel

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        [-]
          ·  3 years ago 

        Kommt ein 70-Jähriger in die Apotheke fragt nach Viagra. Der Apotheker gibt ihm eine Packung und der Mann nimmt sofort eine Tablette heraus, zerdrückt sie auf dem Tresen und schnupft das Pulver durch die Nase. Der Apotheker erschrickt: „Sie machen das ganz falsch!“ Sagt der Mann: „Alles ok, in meinem Alter findet Sex ohnehin nur noch im Kopf statt.“

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          [-]
            ·  3 years ago 
          • How is it that Pepe is doing so well lately?
          • I owe it to a pig I bought. It was a little pricey, but it's genius! He is able to go to the casino and win! Thanks to that I no longer have financial problems. In addition, a gold and oil mine has been discovered on my farm. He himself is in charge of negotiating the contracts. As if that were not enough, a month ago our house burned down and he rescued me and my family at the risk of his own life.
          • Awesome! Can I see it, Pepe?
          • Yes, of course, it's that one: the one with the wooden legs.
          • A pig with two wooden legs? What happened?
          • Man! With the affection that we have taken for it, you will not believe that we are going to eat it all at once!

          AND COLORIN COLORADO THIS ASS HAS BEEN EXPLODED
          @fun-games

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            [-]
              ·  3 years ago 

            Era un chiste tan malo, tan malo… que se burlaba de los chistes más pequeños.

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                ·  3 years ago 

              ¿Quiénes son los más ingeniosos? Los calvos, porque no tienen ni un pelo de tontos.

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                [-]
                  ·  3 years ago (edited)

                1

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