manipulative friends and couples

in honest •  7 years ago 

To all those manipulative friends and couples

That has happened to me with several lios / boyfriends and I have friends like that.
I always had a hard time saying no. To discuss. The conflict blocked me. Hence, most abusers and rapists are friends or couples: for trust you tell yourself that it must be a mistake. That he misunderstood you and will not happen again. You petrify because you do not want to argue with that person so important to you. You feel silly for not just talking to him. Maybe he would understand and respect you. Everything would be normal again.

But perhaps he knows perfectly what he is doing. Perhaps your signs of rejection and discomfort are clear but he insists.
Maybe he knows you will not say anything to his face. That has happened to me and mogollonazo of aunts.
That's why I want to tell everyone: you can not go as an ally and then say barbarities about feminists. It does not matter if your views differ from yours. It is not enough to be left to be a good person.

You can not go slow and get constantly with people hooked to the mobile and RRSS when you are all the time reviewing, trolling, debating and controlling your virtual kingdom.
You know that nobody ever says anything to your face. You make sexist, racist, homophobic, classist jokes ... and your people laugh and applaud you. No one tells you that you are acting like a brother-in-law, because nobody wants to admit it. It is ugly. It is better to let it go.

I do you a favor saying all that, because you do not even give 100% account of the crap you are sometimes.
You are an adult, you have a job, a circle of influence. And you use that influence to manipulate. In each discussion (debate, you'll say) you manipulate the aunts to humiliate them, mess them up and make them hysterical.
You are not to listen, you are to jump the throat to others and win. That you applaud.
You say incredibly toxic things. Things about having balls. Be cool Do not teach feelings.
Zero empathy. Ridicule any effort of social conscience.
You decide to ignore a lot of problems because they do not affect you and you say they are nonsense.
Everything revolves around you, your life. Like an immense theater. That's worrying about millenials.

The males do not feel.

You only share feminism when you do not feel that it is against you. Postureo Handling.
If you do not want to be that person, look at it. If this is how you are, assume it and do not pretend.
Assume that people do not give a shit if it is not to flatter you, to eat your tail (literally).
You get involved with feminists because they do not know how to express themselves so that their message is understood, but in each discussion when you are criticized you say that "that is not what I said".
It does not matter because in reality that debate is just a facade for your favorite sport: manipulate. Humble.
The vice of hurting to feel strong. Such behavior is scary. Treating aunts as sexual objects, talking about them in a degrading and sexual way is scary. Ignoring the rules of consent is scary. Telling aunts if what they say is or is not feminist has a name: macho manipulation.
There are things that do not go over you and rules that you do not put and that gives you a stick.
You need people to be honest with you and not laugh at your banter jokes or applaud your machiruladas.
You're welcome, for telling all those shits and leaving you with the choice of looking at what you do, the consequences and meaning or sweating of everything.

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