"That's the name of my autobiography"

in humor •  7 years ago 

About a year ago I met a girl named Haylee. I met Haylee at our home town local brewery, The Dark Horse. At the time Haylee worked at the dark horse. I almost remember the day I met her except I was day drunk upon arrival, I was coming from a wedding, and Haylee had just gotten out of work.

Hayeyy.jpg

We drunkly exchanged numbers, I stored hers under the name Hayeyy, and we've kind of been best friends ever since.

Haylee and I talk all day everyday, about anything and everything and we have a long running joke that whenever we say something dark or insulting to ourselves we say "that's the name of my autobiography". I realized today that if we actually wrote a book for everytime we said we were going to write a book, we'd have a lot of books to write before we die. After some talk, we decided if we had autobiographies, they would just be full of short stories.

Hayeyy.png

The two things that make me the happiest in this world? A good fucking burger, and I mean like I want to spend $17 dollars on this burger type of burger. And tabs of LSD. If anyone ever has to ask themselves "I wonder what Mariah wants" look no further than red meet and drugs.

End short story for today.

Who else can't believe that the biggest bar night of the year is tomorrow?! And apparently Thanksgiving is the day after. Safe travels to anyone and everyone out there doing their thing. Cheers to steemit!

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