Making art, trusting the process

Good day everyone!

I am an illustrator and I'm slowly putting up all my work on Steemit bit by bit. I already have them up on Instagram(@gugu_monsta) but the difference is that I'm adding more backstory about the pieces. I feel the Steemit platform works really well for that!

Today I'm putting up this drawing I made in a very flow state. No planning, no thinking, no pencil. Direct drawing with a pen, and then later colored with watercolors. It's very different from my usual stuff which is more labored.

I've been practicing and working on improving my work for years now. For the most part, it has seemed like one step forward two steps back. All the practice has made my lines are cleaner and it's definitely easier to draw but I still keep looking for that "spark" in my work. Recently I discovered a reason why this has been lacking! And this is huge for me. It is a case of lacking trust in myself.

What is the relation you ask? Every time I'm putting pen to paper, trying to draw a line, there are countless doubts and thoughts of how the line should be, how the piece has to turn out, where I might go wrong. As a result, the line I make is weighed down and doesn't flow freely. And at the end, the finished piece feels stiff and heavy. No fun at all.

So recently, I go out with a pen and paper, sit in front of a plant I like and start sketching. Direct sketching with no penciling. As I begin, I create the thought, "I trust you, Gugu. Make whatever you feel like, wavery lines and all."

These pieces will be coming up soon. So follow me if you want to see them :)

Love,
Gugu