How do you increase your willpower; is it something you just have or can you train it? I recently became a nonsmoker and whilst it was something I really wanted to do, it still took a lot of willpower.
A lot of things said in the comment section got me musing about the nature of willpower and how to improve it. It seems a lot of you out there really want to give up smoking too, but claim that you don't have the willpower to carry it through.
I myself wasn't born with a natural amount of willpower, it is something that I have built up, specifically over the last few years, so I felt it was time to share some secrets with you and to help you build up your willpower, which in turn help you do whatever it is you've got to do, whether it be quitting smoking or studying for an exam.
What Is Willpower?
Before we go on I think it would be prudent if we analyse exactly what willpower is, and then we can discuss how to attain and strengthen it.
Quite simply, willpower describes your ability to be able to carry out tasks which are mentally, and/or physically difficult to perform.
Another way of putting it is; willpower is your ability to operate outside of your comfort zone. Which makes complete sense, because tasks that take place within your comfort zone are easy to do. Things like binge watching the latest addictive series on Netflix, or playing whatever computer game you might be into, are pretty easy to do right?
What about eating sugary and fatty foods, or playing on your phone as you go to a job that doesn't challenge you in any way, shape or form?
Whatever it is, I'm sure that you can define the borders of your personal comfort zone, because if you are low on willpower then the mere thought of going beyond those borders will cause you mental discomfort.
What Is The Zone?
So if willpower is the ability to operate outside of your comfort zone, then the amount you have is directly related to the size of your zone.
For instance a new born baby's stomach is about the size of (an English) 50p piece, roughly equivalent to a dollar coin. Therefore it cannot fit very much food in there; this is why babies often throw up (usually on your shoulder just after you've picked them up!).
Seeing as they are growing faster than they'll ever grow in their lives, a newborn needs a lot of food to survive. However the combination of a tiny stomach and a huge need for food, means that they cannot really stand being hungry for very long, and so will scream the place down till they get some milk.
So it is perhaps relevant to say that a newborn baby's comfort zone can be proportionally measured to the size of its stomach.
As the child grows, so too does their stomach, and the amount of time they can be hungry without wanting to scream the house down also increases.
This is a useful analogy to keep in mind when it comes to thinking of your comfort zone. The longer you can go without food when you're hungry is analogous to how long you can operate outside of your comfort zone.
Understanding The Role Of Willpower Within Your Zone
Of course as we grow and become more aware our comfort zone is not just linked to food. It gets linked to all sorts of physical and mental attributes. For instance how long you can concentrate on a task, or how long you may be able to withstand cold temperatures.
Now imagine that your comfort zone is represented by how many balls you can keep in the air at any one time. So when you're a child of six, you are only comfortable with throwing up one ball and catching it.
Then as you get older you get to a point whereby you can keep two balls in the air. As you reach adulthood, you find that you can keep three balls in the air, however this is where most adults stop trying to throw any more balls up.
So for years you get adept at juggling three balls, in fact you can do all sorts of fancy tricks within this technique.
Then one day I give you a fourth ball, it will be uncomfortable for you and you will most likely drop the balls. Your willpower is represented by your determination to learn to juggle those four balls and not go back to the now easy task of juggling three.
However if instead of waiting for me to give you a fourth ball, out of your own volition you decide that you will practice for ten minutes a day using just one more ball, eventually you will become adept at juggling four instead of three.
In other words, you will have grown the size of your comfort zone. Another thing you will have done, is increase your potential for trying new things, so when I suggest going from four to five balls, you will be more open to the idea.
In the next part of this series we will explore techniques that will allow you to expand your comfort zone, and at the same time increase your willpower.
Stay tuned!
DO YOU HAVE PROBLEMS WITH WILLPOWER? DO YOU KNOW HOW TO EXERCISE AND STRENGTHEN IT, OR ARE YOU STUCK IN YOUR OWN PERSONAL COMFORT ZONE?
AS EVER, LET ME KNOW BELOW!
I suppose I do have a lack of willpower. It of course depends on the definition. See the problem comes in when there is a conflict between what I should do and what I want to do. Sounds like you 100% wanted to stop smoking. Well what if your doc said to stop but you only wanted to stop 50% lol. I am looking forward to the rest, my friend :)
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Ah yes, desire has to align with willpower :-) I guess I'm talking to all the people who say they really want to stop but can't.
Although... hmm, I don't want to spoil the upcoming ones :-)
Cg
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Willpower is all about how powerful you think you are. We have heard the stories in the past like, there were some people who were so powerful that they could do anything.
I like the example you quoted in your article of a baby, you willpower grows as you grow, but it depends on the strength of your mind, Suppose you want to do something, and the other people think that it is impossible, but you know you can do that, it's your willpower, whatever is the task, how tough it is, if you can think you can do that, yes you can do that.
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It will definitely look like a challenge when one started working on expanding the will power, but once mastered, it become normal and ordinary. you willpower grows as you grow, but it depends on the strength of your mind.Willpower is what we need in order to step out of our comfort zone, grow and be better, its amazing.I thing every man should be willpower than he will success in life
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Thank you for your most inspirational article. I am also trying very hard to quit smoking.
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Willpower is what we need in order to step out of our comfort zone, grow and be better, its amazing how with consistent practice we become comfrotable with that which seemed uncomfortable to us at first.
I don't have much problem with willpower but whenever I find it hard to exercise it, I remind myself how important it is for me to exercise that inner strength (it most times work for me), and sometimees I try to slow down a bit, one step at a time.
It was a great read! Let me go read the second part!
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Poor me, I read part two before one... Lol
Well, I still pick the message you are trying to pass across.
What a beautiful way to grow our willpower you have analysed using various life examples...
It will definitely look like a challenge when one started working on expanding the will power, but once mastered, it become normal and ordinary.
Following the example in this post, we can surely overcome any weakness no matter what.
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