— SteemCN

No, she was such a mess, I'd say near mental breakdown. I told her just come up here and stay for awhile, relax a bit. She was more worried about not being able to do her thing, she asked if she could do it when I wasn't around, I told her it probably wouldn't work out well as I am always around, plus I didn't want that stuff on my internet protocol as I didn't want products related to her profession showing up on my computer. She got her own internet connection and promised to only do it when I wasn't here...after I got off the internet last night I just wanted to go outside and scream after getting into it with her about not sanitizing the bathroom sink after washing her toys...it was bad enough she was already breaking the rules listening to her slapping her ass to sick weirdos on the internet, moaning and groaning and I just got into with her again. I just told her pack your stuff and go I can't handle that sick shit after she started up again tonight after I was gone all day where she could have done her crap. Can you believe that after I slammed the door several times she comes out with that crap in her hand, walks in the bathroom, rinses it without sanitizing and as I approached her to tell her I've had enough she slams the bathroom door in my face and informs me she has to work, that's when I told her just pack up and go I can't handle it, it's humiliating, it's worse than listening to two real people having sex as you know she's having sex with herself to appease wackos on the internet willing to dole out seven dollars a minute which she gets a thirty five percent cut of from some company on the internet. It's twisted to put it bluntly. She's like living with the worse kind of a Medusa, she has split personalities, it's horrible but even if it was without going through all this I knew it was going to be horrible with or without her nasty work habit, she's just not a nice person, never has been...being the second oldest of a highly dysfunctional family I've always been the one pinned into watching out for the younger siblings. It was just under a year ago that I finally didn't have to deal with my brother anymore, he passed away last May but I had told him he had to go a couple months prior to that but it took time for them to find someplace for him to go. Sometimes I feel sort of bad as it only took them less than thirty days to kill him, they kept telling us he was going to die but three years later here he was still here, he'd walk off with two oxygen tanks on rollers out getting drunk and high then come back and drive me crazy. I'd thrown him out a couple times but ended up taking him back when adult foster homes they put him in wanted him out, of course he'd always say he was done with the partying. You know I spent very little time of my life living with him, it was literally like going to skid row, picking up a bum and bringing them home. We were put in foster care as children, he was the second youngest, one of the last to come home, I was the second oldest and one of the first to escape that god forsaken household. Sorry if I am blabbering on and on, it's been stressful the last couple months, on top of all this I've had to deal with the passing of a couple of old friends. I really should write a post but with so much going on sometimes I just don't know where to start...and it wouldn't be like anyone would really care anyway, I guess it'd be like me talking to myself to relieve some tension.

lol, I was just about ready to say we've been avoiding each other since the other night and haven't said probably ten words to each other when all of a sudden here she comes. It was all good and friendly until she felt the need to broach the subject of her job and how she's stuck doing it, then went on to try and explain what I think is lube in the sink is spit...

...sometimes it amazes me how I get stuck into these things or how I survive them, at least she's not waking up at six, seven, eight in the morning, which depending upon which time I go to bed is like the middle of my night screaming in anguish over some of the stuff she's been through the last couple years, I attribute that into talking her into getting some counseling, which last week she came back emotionally drained afterwards, maybe they reached the part where they try and reason with the person that your occupation is contributing greatly to your problems. Thanks for the luck I am not just sure but positive I will need it.

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