Pleased to Meet You, I'm the Cannibal Cabbage.

It occurs to me that in my first post, I didn't give a proper introduction, so here is mine:

I am the Cannibal Cabbage. Many humans think cannabalism is to eat humans. Don't worry though, I'm here to set your human minds at ease. Cannibalism is actually the act of eating one's own kind.
That's right, I eat cabbages. Why would I eat cabbages, you ask? Because cabbages are tasty, that's why!Not that Coleslaw garbage, though. That's desecrated cabbage stewed in things you shouldn't even put in your body. Cabbages are juicy, crisp, and a little sweet. If you haven't tried them, you really should.

I always ask others, what is a sapient cruciferous vegetable supposed to eat, anyway? It's not like humans are a good food source. I've seen your diet, and if you are what you eat, human isn't a very good food. Not to mention the fact that you people like to fight back. Hunting humans is dangerous work! Besides, you don't even taste that good. Or so I hear. Not that I've ever eaten human. That "Standard American Diet" is enough to keep me away, even if the fighting back part wasn't. Besides, have you ever seen the babies that grow in cabbage patches? Those chubby little monsters are the stuff of nightmares!

Now, you may be thinking the cannibal cabbage must be good to eat, since he is of course, a cabbage. I wouldn't like that, though. As you can see from my stunning photograph, I do, in fact, have teeth with which to bite. If you tried to eat me, I'd be forced to use said teeth in self defence. Then, I guess I would find out if the rumors are true, and if humans really do taste terrible. It's my personal policy that one should never eat things that don't want to be eaten. Plants are happy to let you eat them. Ever tried to eat a tiger? I bet not. Try walking up to a tiger with a fork in hand and see what happens. I bet they'd get quite cross.

This isn't a great introduction is it? All I've been talking about is eating things. It doesn't tell much about me. I suppose I should give a little detail about where I came from. After all, sapient cabbages, let alone cannibal sapient cabbages, aren't very common.

I was concived a bit unconventionally. Rather than a typical sprout popping happily out of a seed in a garden, I was created in a lab. Well, that's not really true. I once was a simple cabbage. I did sprout happily out of a seed in a garden. Not that I have any memory of that time. Only a vague feeling of being at peace. Like some pleasant sensation of being grounded. I suppose that's what zen feels like. But let's not get side tracked.

Little did I know, I had a greater destiny than to end up in some farmer's salad. I was plucked prematurely from the cabbage patch and taken as an offering for the mad workings of a wizard. Seeing this little cabbage was picked too early, he decided rather than eating me or using me for spellcraft, he would do something a little different. He took my pre-ripe little cabbaginess (yes, that's a word) and started experimenting. Not even he knew what would come of those experiments, because he was mad. "Mad-as-a-Hatter" type mad, not angry mad. As all of this was before I became a concious entity, I can only tell what he told me. Furthermore, his tinkering with magics are something I cannot begin to understand, so I'm afraid I cannot do this story true justice, but what I can say is this. He tried many different combinations of spellcraft, in his attempts to create me. I'm told vegetables are not predisposed to holding more than a little magic at any given time. This being the case, magic items created from vegetables don't really hold out for longer than it takes the vegetable in question to rot. This caused many issues for my creator. Most early attempts resulted in no more than a mild explosion, and a frustrated cleaning lady. As far as I know, I'm the first vegetable ever to survive the process.

So here I am, learning to get through a life that didn't expect me. Spending time shocking those around me with my mere existence. It's not easy for a cabbage to keep a low profile in a world filled with tall bipedal mamals as the dominant sapient species. Sure, I'm small, and can hide well, but how often do you see a cabbage move? That really catches the eye. So between frightened, angry, and surprized responses, not to mention hungry vegetarians, cities are not for me. I spend most of my time away from everyday humans and more in the company of other strange creations, and wizards. Fortunately, my creator is not only a strange, sapient vegetable maker, but a traveler of worlds, or perhaps universes. We pop back and forth, moving from time to time, world to world. Some worlds are harder than others. This one is rather fun. With it's imaginitive technologies, I'm able to keep out of the public eye, and still have everything I need. Even in a big city. I just have to be careful of rabbits and resturaunts.

I'm easy to get along with, and really enjoy a good conversation. Don't be shy, I won't bite. Unless you try to bite first.