Hello Steemit! Just another lonely IT guy.

Hello steemit!

I have never been one for great introductions or photos of myself so perhaps I should just give a short summary of who I am and my life in general, to help others understand who I am and what I am about.

I am in my early 30's, over-weight and for over half of my life I have been a huge fan and supporter of anything that is based on technology and ways to utilize it to make all of our lives easier and more enjoyable. I got my first computer when I was 11 and since then I have basically lived on the computer. Friends, relationships, games, almost all social interaction that's not related to co-workers or family have been through it. As such I don't go out much and have slowly developed some social anxiety. I don't feel like it has held me back much aside from occasional not knowing how to react to a joke, but the biggest drawback is that I have no idea how to approach the opposite sex. I am often told I'm a great guy, and I'm funny, but I lack confidence. A lot.

After leaving high school I went right to a small tech school and got my 2yr degree in 18 months which I then transferred to a 4yr and that turned into my first IT job. This did help me socially as in college I mostly kept to myself, but for work it meant I had to travel to the city from the suburbs. I had a wider range of people I was required to interact with for my job and was often asked to join them for either grabbing something at lunch or drinks after work. For the next 7 or 8 years, that job was great, until the management changed and I decided that it was now time that I moved on. No matter how much I loved the people I worked with and became to know them as my friends instead of just "users" the job and the management above was literally making me imagine getting hit by a bus on my walk to the building every day.

My next job was much less social as I spent most of my time alone in a car, or on calls. When I was at clients it was just to get a task done and there was much less time or requirement for me to chit-chat with others. This lasted barely 2 years before I was over stressed again as I was almost isolated while working and barely even had time to talk with my online friends.

Recently I ended up at another small company much like the first where I am back to working in a regular building and helping "users" that have been slowly turning into friends. The environment is not as tightly knit as the first job, but there is also much more of a priority on the bottom line here than environment and getting to know your co-workers. The office's area is also not in the best of areas so there are very few places to leave the office for lunch or get drinks to better get to know each other over.

I'm getting to the point in my life that I feel like I should have pushed myself to get out more when I was younger and I really regret not doing so, but I have always been so self-conscious that I was borderline terrified of interaction. I've recently started to work on losing weight, and so far that has made me feel like I have more energy and a bit more confidence. People say they have noticed I'm looking better but I still partly just believe they say that to make me feel better, even if they don't notice any change. I've been trying to connect with some old co-workers and friends that are in my area to help get out of the house some, mostly on weekends, but I just can't get over the feeling that they are more agreeing to meet up out of either pity or lack of anything else to do.

I'm trying to convince myself that slowly I'll get out of it and I'll start undoing what years of self-isolations done to me, but it will take time. Sorry for the long block of almost rambling text!

TLDR: Hi!