'''They were simply continuing the chain, the domino effect of how their parents treated them and their parents before them and so on and so forth.''' >>> Exactly. Disorder doesn't come out of nothing. It also follows the 'cause and effect' principle!
But like you said, there's a small window of timeframe where we have the free will to decide who we want to be and what traits we want to carry on...
The way you phrase it, Kate, your words replicate all of your feelings in someone else's heart too.
"'But sometimes to get to that point of conscious decision-making we need to rip the scab away to analyse and prod where we came from."'
Maybe it doesn't even matter? If you could just completely detach yourself from the past?
Maybe. I do frequently suspect that I over-intellectualise things! Of course my entire personal challenge is to de-attach from the intellectualising mind and to allow feelings to canalise through my feeling centres. Open my heart to feelings unfiltered and undefended by the brain.
The thing is that I do feel a certain empowerment from being able to intellectually label things. I guess it brings it into my sphere of control (the opposite of surrendering to the flood of feelings I know!). I guess because I lost confidence in my own instinctive judgement that I felt I required some guiding lights in the dark, and all the psychology theory somewhat serves that purpose to return some confidence in my own decisions.
I'm very emotionally entangled with my family, even though it is so fragmented. Whilst I feel that I have some role in this life to go towards curing my family situation, I also intuit that I need to de-attach from that responsibility. For whilst we heal together, ultimately each one must take responsibility for their own healing, at least the first conscious decision to step in that direction, for if they don't want to heal, no-one will ever be able to force them.
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"For whilst we heal together, ultimately each one must take responsibility for their own healing, at least the first conscious decision to step in that direction, for if they don't want to heal, no-one will ever be able to force them."
Glad to connect with you @kate-m I do not have anything else to say but I do want to tell you that you're one of the most open-minded and transparent individual I've met in my life. There are rarely any people on my friendlist with whom I can hold deep conversations. Everyone is so isolated and unreachable.
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Ha ha, thanks for the complement. Yes, for an IntroduceYourself post we did rather get into the nitty gritty! But then that was rather the tone of your post, it got me thinking!
The other day I was sitting waiting for a Chinese takeaway and the other girl waiting suddenly asked me what was the meaning of life, she was clearly passing through some sort of angsty existential crisis. We had a really deep conversation for ten minutes as we waited for the food to come out. I guess the point is, you receive back what you put out!
See you around!
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See you around @kate-m :)
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