DO NOT READ THIS if you want to be bored. RossKnows is...going...live

Hello friends,

My name is Evan. You may be asking yourself, but probably are not, "Who is Ross and why is Evan writing about him?" Ross is my middle name, bestowed upon my loins by my birth parents and actual parents, who, ironically, are the same people.

Post conception, I went on to win a math award in 4th grade and get a bird picture I drew featured in the city art show. Whilst these triumphs may have catapulted some into fame and fortune in the annals of recess, I chose to not let my accomplishments define me.

Fast forward to 2017. I am 27 years old. I enjoy doing a myriad of things, several of such being quite detrimental to my physical and mental health. The list of my hobbies and pursuits would bore Richard Simmons at an 80's disco -- so I'll list them for you.

-Cooking [Not Meth]
-Spray-Painting
-Woodwork [Get your mind out of the gutter]
-Procrastination
-Dressing up non-important messages in verbose language
-Scheming
-Hustling
-Scheming about Hustling
-Post-Hardcore Music Playlists Created By Users Who Just CTRL-V Whole Albums At A Time
-Writing
-Baseball
-SteemIt
-Brown-Nosing
-Golf
-CryptoCurrency [New Investor YAAAAAAAS!!]

Congrats! You've made it across the winding river in your horse-drawn carriage! I hope you did not hire the Native Americans because they are notorious for overcharging to compensate for the inadequate tipping practices of early settlers such as Lewis and Clark. As it turns out, they treated Sacagawea in such a fiscally poor manner, that the US government felt obligated to name a coin after her some 200 years later. USA! USA! )

Anywho, I am truly excited to be a part of this community, and I sincerely look forward to interacting with all of you in one way or another. My interests are wide, so I hope your pockets are deep. Wryness aside, thank you for welcoming me, and let's get after it and keep up the good content! Ross out.

Cheers,
Evan