From one super critical self medicating depressed person to another. I think you pretty much summed up what this year has been for me. minus the therapist and the anti depressants and the drugs. There has been plenty of alcohol for me, but no drugs since i rather furiously ate LSD for about three years straight.. Writing is my personal outlet these days. I have several journals sprawled around my home filled with varying degrees of writing. Its hard to be kinder to yourself but its a must. I know i have to remind myself everyday that i have to be nicer to myself or give credit to myself because i deserve it.

For me i find the best thing to do is to wake up each day and find one good thing from the previous day. That is my morning ritual. I think of the one thing from the day before, no matter how small it is, that put a smile on my face. It can be the sun as it rises while i sip coffee on the back porch, to the awful pun that i made and none of my coworkers laughed at it. I pick that moment the next morning and i allow it to bring a smile to my face and i focus on that smile and the feeling it brings .