在我的柠檬水摊子，第一杯柠檬水是免费的，第二杯收费5美元。续杯里面有解药。
At my lemonade stand, I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote.
90岁时的滚床单就像是用根儿绳子打台球。
Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.
-洋葱和孩子有什么不同点？
-剥洋葱的时候会流泪。
-What’s the difference between a baby and an onion?
-I cry peeling Onions!
爆炸发生后露西去哪儿了？遍地都是。
Where did Lucy go after the bombing?
Everywhere.
在死后，尸体中唯一温热的器官是哪个？我的小和尚。
After death, what is the only organ in the body which remains warm? My penis.
耶稣和耶稣画像有什么区别？画像只需要一颗钉子就能挂住。
What is the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang the painting.