In The Vacuum Again, Livin' La Vida Loca!

What can I say?! - Crazy times!?! - It would be mimosa's gentle description, while things are winding up in some entirely lunatic whirl.

^{_{Image from Pixabay. Credits to Waqutiar Rahaman for nature-sky, used under the Pixabay license.}}

The thing is that in the last four months I changed four companies. (One of the reasons why I wasn't so active around here.)
It would be nice if it were one company per month but, of course, it wasn't like that.

The company I was working for, for over a year, went down. It happened because of some financial and tax acrobatics of the owners in a very gray zone.

Playing smart, they bought a new already active small company that had low revenue in the past few years. The whole team of workers (including me) was moved to that new one. The transition stole us about a week. Inactive week means, no many for that period.

A few days after that week, just when we began to adjust to the change and the working wheel started to roll again, the owners realized that they bought a wrong company without needed licenses. As obtaining the new ones might take several months, they decided to close that new company too. The whole team was left on the street, literally overnight.

^{_{Image from Pixabay. Credits to skeeze for typhoon-eye, used under the Pixabay license.}}

The crazy whirl spun faster, dragging me down in its hole. - What now, I was asking myself?!

I called an old acquaintance, and the next day I had the interview in the company he was working at the time. Everything went well, and I started to work the following week. Another lost week! But hey, who cares!? I've got a job (despite the fact of about 10% lower salary)!

I was working there for about a week when the owner told me how he still didn't hire me officially (register to the local institutions as he should) because he is selling the company to the new owner. I was told I would be paid, but without (otherwise obligatory) health insurance and pension fund money.

The new owner (and CEO) was introduced, and he took over the company the following week. In other words, I was illegally working for two weeks (without health insurance and the money for my pension fund).

Finally, I got officially hired, and a week after that, the new owner decided to change the company name. The consequence of the stupid name change was that the old licenses (issued on the previous name of the company) were not valid anymore and the new ones should be obtained. The new owner ("big manager") didn't know that!

I couldn't get rid of the feeling that he is "livin' la vida loca," but instead of the dancing excitement on the rain, I was afraid I'm going to experience only the "bullet in the brain."

However, history somewhat started to repeat itself! Meaning, instead of closing the company due to lack of required licenses, the new owner (CEO) decided to pull some heavy strings, and allegedly he was promised to get them in about a week (instead a few months).

It turned out that the licenses were issued in ten days. Real miracle! But still, it was ten days out of work for which we didn't get paid.

The following month or so, went more or less normally if I don't count in some alleged extra expenses that the company had, and because of which our salary was slightly decreased.

^{_{Image from Pixabay. Credits to Rudy and Peter Skitterians for cloudscape, used under the Pixabay license.}}

"The bullet in the brain" arrived yesterday, and with it, the whirl's crater became wide open.
Just three weeks before my younger son's wedding, with the last preparations and expenses ahead of us, I felt I could only fall through that open hole and with my whole weight, in full speed kiss the ground.

It's not that my employer didn't know anything about it. In opposite! He was informed, but still, he called me yesterday afternoon to tell me that it was my last working day. I was speechlessly shocked!

After a short silent pause, he continued explaining by telling me that he is closing the company as the profit is not in the amount he was expecting.
- WHAAAAAAAT???!!! - I wanted to yell, but I stood silent in disbelief.

I really don't know what this "big manager" was expecting in a month or two (the most), where one-fourth of the time we were not able to work because of the stupid company name change and accompanying loss of the existing licenses, followed with lost working time due to obtaining the new ones!?!

Another excuse was wrapped into the complaints of low productivity (he mentioned some numbers) of my colleagues. Although his objections didn't concern me as I know my numbers are way higher, I didn't feel any better.

But the last drop that overflowed my glass was when he dared to file an objection regarding my part-time aside extra work, without which I don't know how would I walk through all these non-working and non-paid periods.

And did I mentioned that two days before, on Monday, he asked me for a not so small urgent favor which I did it although I wasn't obligatory to do it by any means and even though I wouldn't gain anything by doing that?!

It was the end of the conversation for me. Enough is enough!

^{_{Image from Pixabay. Credits to MasterTux for glass-red-wine, used under the Pixabay license.}}

It took me almost a whole three hours to swallow and comprehend what just happened.

My first thoughts were, "I can't anymore! I'm not capable of looking for the new job and some more or less dum new employer with unrealistic greedy expectations, over again. I'm done!"

"Maybe it's time to start my own business?!" - That question hit me too. All the persuasions addressed my way in this regard, and for quite some time, by my family and friends, crossed my mind as well.

Despite that, and putting aside my 15 years long avoidance and running away from any possibility that smells the slightest of jumping again into the entrepreneur's waters, I really don't think it's time. Not yet!
Maybe in six or nine months, or a year from now, but not at the moment!

It's not that I am afraid. I have never been! While many others were or still are dreaming of something like that, I was just sick of it!

My "sickness" is over! So, it's not that either.
It's not the lack of an idea anymore, as well. I know what I'm going to do (at least for a start) and what I want to do. Precisely!

I know that day is coming, and for some time, I even feel in my bones how it's approaching every day closer and closer.
The idea that started to "boil" inside me, at first blurry, became a vision and turned into a plan, long ago.

It's not either that I don't want to leave my comfort zone. Playing low and being in the shadow, ruled and guided (in most cases) by some groundlessly supercilious mediocrities doesn't please me or even less makes me feel comfortable. The days when I was able to push that aside and ignore are long gone.

^{_{Image from Pixabay. Credits to ImagesBG for bridge-river, used under the Pixabay license.}}

So, by any means, it's not anymore that I don't want to. Quite in contrary! But, I have to keep my common sense, stay realistic, and pull myself back not to rush into it just due to recent and current events, as it's not the time, yet!

Although I would love to run away from that uncomfortable, uncertain, and foggy vacuum zone right away, I have to face it out, bare with it still and for some while, to be able to cross over that last bridge that is standing between me today and my final goal.

As the Neale Donald Walsch said,

"Life begins at the end of your comfort zone."

And if that's just a bit so, I have been out and far away from my comfort zone for so long that I must be so close to the beginning of that Life! Not only the one with big "L" but even extremely close to the one with all the letters capitalized...

The LIFE - with different horizons and the fluffy clouded sky above!

^{_{Image from Pixabay. Credits to dimitrisvetsikas1969 for clouds-sky, used under the Pixabay license.}}