“To avoid criticism say nothing, do nothing, be nothing.” ― Aristotle
I wrote my first novel Highfall few years ago. For the first time I wrote fiction, which was longer than 3 pages. But that is not what I would like to write about today.
After finishing the novel I let it ‘’sleep’’ in my computer for months. Only very few close people were provided with the draft to read (i.e. the people, who most probably would not be able to provide objective feedback). No one else…
It was not because I did not want to share the book with others, neither it was because I thought the book was not good enough. The main reason was that I needed some time to get psychologically prepared for criticism. It took quite a while and when I thought I was ready I sent out the novel to several people, who do not know me personally and asked for their honest feedback. I still feel scared about what I will receive, but at the same time I know that it is something I cannot skip in case I want to become a real writer. So now I am both scared and excited at the same time.
How did I manage to reduce the fear of criticism and look at it with different mindset?
Well I came up with several thoughts, which helped me see criticism as something helpful and positive. I guess the below points may apply to almost anything and are not limited to authors/writers and artists.
1. It is not about you
No matter what you may think the critic is not about you – it is rather about what you have created. Do not take it personal. Take it easy.
2. You cannot have a look from the ‘’outside’’
No matter how hard you try there is absolutely no way you can see your creation with stranger’s eyes. How others will perceive what you have done is something you will not be able to know without listening to what they say. There is just no alternative way of finding out…
3. No one is perfect
There is absolutely no one out there, who has got nothing to be criticized about. No one is perfect (even the ones, who seem so).
4. Chance to improve
You are like all the rest not perfect, but that does not mean that you cannot improve. Critic will pinpoint things, which need improvement. Now you will know what to concentrate on and make sure that you focus on the right things.
5. Criticism as success indicator
The more attention your work receives, the more criticism you’ll have to deal with. So don’t be upset by criticism, rather value the fact that at least someone noticed what you did.
6. Filtered criticism
No one said that you should accept everyone’s criticism. There are people, whose opinion may not be important to you. Some people may criticize just for the sake of it; some others may not understand what you’ve done. Decide who you will be listening to and which the points you are ready to accept are.
7. Criticism as strong motivation
No one said that all critics you receive are right. In case they are not, you will have the desire to prove them wrong. And that strong desire will become your motivation to succeed.
8. For someone to criticize you, it means that he/she cares
“He has a right to criticize, who has a heart to help.” ― Abraham Lincoln
The person could have used the time to do many other (more pleasant) things, but he/she chose to take that time and provide you with constructive criticism instead. That itself is something to appreciate.
9. Necessary criticism
We all need criticism from time to time and Mr. Churchill has explained best why “Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.” ― Winston Churchill
10. Keeping the balance
Many people allow criticism ruin their self-confidence. There are some people, on the other hand, who are so self-confident that they refuse to accept any criticism. The key here is trying to keep the balance.
I guess what I mean is: “The trouble with most of us is that we’d rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.” ― Norman Vincent Peale
And I guess the most important is how you move forward after the criticism.
Will I forget about my novel in case of negative criticism?
Will I improve it based on the feedback I receive?
Will I give up my decision to become a writer?
The answers for me are No, Yes, No…That is my point.
One has to decide the limits of how much power one is ready to give to the critic… and only then seek one.
I personally will keep going… what about you?
Would love to hear about how you deal with criticism and what do you think about the topic in general.
What a great way to prepare yourself!
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anyone who's putting himself out there needs to be prepared )
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Absolutely
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YES TO ALL OF THIS.
i always preferred hearing the things that were wrong with my work during workshops as those areas were the places needing the most amount of work. i actually thrive on hearing the negative more than the positive. these are all solid bits of advice for sure!
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the problem with positives is - you never know if they are genuine or told simply not to offend you with the truth )
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absolutely. i'd rather hear something i don't want to hear than someone kissing my ass just to kiss my ass or protect my feelings. i've been writing so long at this point, my skin has gotten pretty thick.
plus you can usually tell when someone's being genuine, especially when they're not used to giving criticism directly to the author.
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I still get hurt sometimes, but then I pull myself together and keep writing )
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oh it's not a perfect process and sometimes people have less tact than i'd prefer, but overall, the truth is always better for the creative process.
and you're welcome for the resteem. solid advice deserves a wide platform!
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)
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and thanks for the retweet btw
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Great write up. Can't find a place to criticize it really. I tend to welcome criticism in work and tasks and hate it home. However any amount on either front always pushes me into self reflection and therefore change in my actions, words, deeds, tasks, etc. Pressure begets growth I suppose. Thank you for such a wonderful article. You've got my vote in absence of any criticism I can provide. Lol
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thank you so much for reading + the comment
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Constructive criticism must always be conveyed in a way that is not condescending. That way, the person is going to be more receptive to what you are saying. Good post.
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true and thanks !
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This Post was Added to the Steemit Social Media Queue.
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hmmmm I am a newbie - what does that mean?
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Means this was an excellent post sweets and I agree. Should consider following @hilarski, he's a great quality content provider (and we'd love to have him in #thealliance ;)
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hehe - I see. Following him now )
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Nom
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Very true
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It is better to learn from mistakes made than to never have ventured to make them in the first place.
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agree!
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Great post! I love constructive criticism
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thank you Chris!
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criticism is an important tool for self improvement
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yes it is
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I have a somewhat different opinion regarding this. If criticism is thrown upon us, the best way to deal with it is as you said above. But, I believe that people should not criticize. The majority of humans criticize each other instead of appreciting each other. This is because of the negative mindset that we carry. Instead of looking for the positive in things, we look for the negative.We can't accept change and the individualists suffers the most because of this. What do you think?
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I think you are right - and you describe the ideal world where people don't critisize and have a positive mindset. BUt unfortunately, I don't see that world happening in the near future (
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We writers always talk about the impossible, don't we? LOL
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yup
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i have not been a fan of anyone for a long time
but truth to be told your posts as far as i have read few of them are are really inspiring in both steemit and in real life
Glad to be a follower of yours :)
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thank you )
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Great Post! When I think of criticism I think of leadership development. Embracing criticism and being a great leader go hand in hand. The very best leaders learn to seek out criticism in order to nurture their self awareness. Quality criticism used to build self awareness helps us lead.
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smart as always Art )
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