You might not be aware of it, but there is a pattern of thoughts and behaviors that prevent you from achieving your goals. It may be a defense mechanism against uncomfortable feelings and emotional pain, or an attempt to control a situation. Regardless of the reason, you need to discover how to identify and stop this destructive behavior. Here are three common reasons you engage in self-sabotage. 1. Fear of discomfort and loss
Self-sabotage is a pattern of thoughts and behaviors that create obstacles to achieving your goals
If you've ever failed to achieve your goals, you've probably felt frustrated and anxious about the situation. Perhaps you've been in the same relationship for a long time or failed a job interview. Regardless of the cause, these feelings of frustration can trap you and prevent you from doing what you need to do. Self-sabotage can have serious consequences for your relationships and your self-esteem. Fortunately, self-sabotage can be addressed by readjusting your thoughts and emotions.
It is a way of protecting you from emotional pain
If you are feeling emotionally hurt or overwhelmed by a difficult situation, you may be engaging in self-sabotage behaviors. This behavior often comes from feelings of fear, anxiety, anger, and worthlessness. In an attempt to protect yourself from such feelings, you may be destroying yourself in order to avoid stressful or scary situations. In many cases, self-sabotage is an attempt to protect yourself from the emotional pain that comes with achieving success.
It is a way of avoiding discomfort
In addition to averting discomfort, self-sabotage can be a symptom of emotional or behavioral dysregulation. Trauma, neglect, or childhood abuse can create a dysregulation in a person's behavior, resulting in self-destructive reactions. To combat this, you can take action to avoid self-sabotage and improve your wellbeing. Here are some tips for overcoming your self-sabotaging tendencies:
It is a way of controlling a situation
While self-sabotage is rarely intentional, it can happen. Often, we will take steps to avoid a particular situation by focusing on the negative aspects of it. Similarly, we may reframe our goals or emotions so that they lose their meaning. Whether we are acting out of fear or anxiety, our self-destructive behaviors are unhelpful. This article aims to shed light on the various types of self-sabotage and how to recognize them.
It is a way of avoiding conflict
Sometimes self-sabotage is not a conscious act. It can be a way of getting out of a relationship or pursuing something new. Either way, talking through it with a partner can help prevent it. Self-sabotage is often the result of fear and negative thinking. It can be a sign of a deeper problem. If you notice these behaviors in yourself, then you may be a self-saboteur.