What It's Like Living With Tourette's Syndrome

Tourette's syndrome is a condition where the sufferer performs repetitive and involuntary tics. These tics may either be physical or vocal. Examples of these tics include head jerking, eye twitching, making sounds with your nose, elbow jerking, repeating a word or sentence repeatedly, etc.

I personally suffer from head jerking and eye twitching. It started way back in high school, probably due to stress. I have been suffering from it for the past 10 years. And trust me, it is not fun at all.

You feel a ton of anxiety if you try to control these tics. It gets to a point where you feel that a very bad thing will happen if you don't perform the tic. It makes no sense whatsoever but that's what it does. This is especially difficult when you're in public. You try to control it until the anxiety level breaks the tipping point and you give in to your tics. Everyone starts staring at you which in turn shifts the anxiety level to an even higher gear which makes you tic even more. It's a never ending cycle.

One of the hardest parts is explaining to people that you're not batshit crazy. They often confront me about it asking if I'm suffering from depression. I can confidently say that I don't. But who knows, I may have been depressed back in high school and that triggered this.

It also creates several awkward situations especially at work. I remember one time the CEO stopped the BOD meeting because he thought I was having a seizure. To be fair his wife has epilepsy so he was legit concerned for me. There was also the time where I consultant thought that I was talking to him but in reality I was head jerking. I tried to play it cool and pretend I was coughing.

I've learned to adapt over the years. When someone asks me about it now I just say that I communicate via Morse code.

To end on light note, here is a list of awkward situations you wouldn't want to get caught in if you had Tourette's:

1. Seating beside another person with Tourette's in a public transport. I fear that people would think that I'm mocking the other person.

2. Involuntarily nodding no during a meeting when asked about important details.

3. Eye to eye with a thug or gangster and you suddenly head jerk. I suggest you run for your life.

4. Involuntary nodding your head upward when a girl is right in front of you. It will be very hard to convince her you're not a pervert.

5. Having a curse word as your vocal tick. Imagine saying the word fuck in between words in your sentence.