Tales of 'Whoa, Dude' From A Digital Panhandler

in life •  5 years ago 

Spotify Says NOPE.

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Will Not "Help a Brotha Out", and Defer Monthly Service Fee for Destitute Subscriber

There are a lot of people who take advantage during the times of economic turmoil. However, with employment of any kind becoming more limited during this pandemic, saving funds wherever you can becomes essential. My first instinct in prolonging my family's savings was to defer or extend as many paid services as possible without paying for them. Oftentimes, service providers will be sympathetic to moments like these and offer services at little to no cost, or to be paid at a later date. Though I do have some "excess funds", and could afford to spend some right now, I've instead tried to save that money for my family in the likely event that this pandemic lasts much longer than we all anticipate. I'm definitely not looking for any handouts, but I won't be ashamed to ask for free services from a corporate conglomerate either. The way I see it, why spend my own money when there are companies that may potentially provide consumers with free services or goods?


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That might be the wrong way to look at things in this troubled time we are all stuck in, but it's a long haul look, and it's a self-preservation look. And, the only one I'm potentially taking advantage of would be the soul sucking she-beast corporate machine, who is only extending an already pre-arranged service agreement I have with them for no cost. I don't think many people would have a problem with my tactics here. But if you do, feel free to file a complaint and then kindly piss off.

That being said, I do understand companies such as Spotify, are a operating a for-profit based business and incur actual costs to provide their product. They also are not classified as an essential service. I can't call Spotify like I can call the electric company and say, "I don't care if the bill is paid or not, I've got an infant in the house, turn it on", as I clutch a bag of Yukon Gold potatoes, representing the infant I lied to the customer service rep about. In any event, during times of need, times of financial difficulty such as these, when millions of people are having trouble paying their bills, on top of which trying to avoid a deadly virus that's floating around our sociological ecosystem, Spotify is by no means required to entertain requests for payment deferments, like an entity such as the utility company might. Spotify also offers a free service with a significantly downgraded user experience (littered with ads, forced to shuffle songs, and doesn't work on any Google or Alexa devices, which is essential if you have a family account and everyone listens through those devices). But so be it, they still offer the free service, which is more than many of its corporate peers offer.

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Just as Spotify is not required to entertain any request for payment deferments, I am also not legally bound to refrain from posting the letter I sent them yesterday, along with their subsequent response promptly sent to me, rejecting my request and cutting off my premium service an hour and a half later, painting them as the twisted, apathetic, uncompassionate corporate monsters they truly must be.


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I provided a copy / paste version of the letter below. You can add your own flare, remove Spotify's name and the few phrases about their specific service, and put just about any company or service name in there. For anyone interested in submitting their own deferment request during these times of economic turmoil:

{insert today's date}
04/08/2020

{insert company contact info}
Spotify
4 World Trade Center
150 Greenwich Street, 62nd Floor
New York, NY 10007
[email protected]

{insert account/subscription info}
Re: Monthly Account Payment for -
{insert name/username/account#/email}

To Whom It May Concern:

I’m writing this letter to ask for an extension or deferment of payment for {insert account info}. My employer had to lay off everyone in my position because of the Coronavirus. A {insert time frame, such as - one/two/three-month} deferment should be enough time for me to overcome this hardship and get back onto a regular payment schedule.

As a {insert job title}, I’m not classified as an essential worker, therefore I have been placed on temporary leave. I’m scheduled to return to work after the state governor lifts the “Stay at Home” order, and it is uncertain when that will be. I tried to get a short-term personal loan, as well as looked for supplemental work among other efforts to earn money. None of my efforts have been fruitful quite yet. As a last resort, I’m writing this letter to you and a few of my other service providers, hopeful that an extension or deferment to my monthly charge could be accommodated. The service your company provides {insert B.S. about how great service is, such as "brings a beacon of hope into an otherwise uncertain world, and it would be difficult losing it"}.

Thank you for considering my request. I look forward to your prompt response.

Sincerely,

{insert your name}

Happy hunting!

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