Ladies and Gentlemen; lets talk.
Here are my views and observations regarding a successful single lady in our society(in the developing 3rd word countries).
Although things are changing gradually, have you had same views and observations?
Jane's diary
Jane is a single lady. Wonderful, good at heart, loves God and a hardworker. Jane principles are straight and easy, she believes in hard work and that everyone has a right to be independent and not dependent on others financially.
So here is Jane's delima,
Jane lives in a society where it is wrong for a woman to be successful and independent of a man. When a young lady who is not married is financially comfortable, she is regarded as irresponsible. Such are referred to in this part of the world as Aristo: Simply means a girl who sells her body in exchange for money.
Jane in her many encounters with people with such belief, cared less of what is thought of her.
Below was one of Jane's experience:
Jane being a beautiful, intelligent, smart career lady, whom as a professional in her field has made quite a success in life. As a six/seven figure earner, she gets herself a comfortable home, nice car and some beautiful basic necessities of life. On a certain day, she went shopping and on coming out of the store, she bumped into a guy at the parking lot.
Here was what transpired between the guy and Jane.
Guy: Hi, how are you. You look pretty.
Jane: smiles; thank you. And walk towards her car.
Guy: I am James, can I talk to you?
Jane: Am sorry please, I have to go. I am running late.
Guy: Ok. Can I have your number?
Jane: No please. Thank you.
Guy: I don't blame you, when your Aristo job earns you so much from the ""money miss road politician", why won't you be so full of yourself. How else can a young lady drive this kind of car, if it was not bought for her by a sugar daddy.
Jane; shaking her head, shut her door and drove off as she had other appointments to meet up.
So here are the questions.
◾How was it Jane's fault to have worked hard and become successful?
◾Was Jane expected to work less or don't work at all, while she waits for a man to marry her and pay her bills?
◾Should Jane, forfeit owning a car, a comfortable home, while she squats and jump the dilapidated buses to show her responsibility as a single lady?
◾Is being married actually the definition of responsible and successful?
Question for the guys?
◾Why do some certain men feel intimidated with a successful lady?
◾Does the word "submissive" really mean a lady should not be successful to be submissive?
We live in a society where we tend to judge other people by our own opinion. A society where a lady is expected to depend on a man. A society where is a taboo for a lady to be successful without the help of a Sugar Daddy(Aristo).
A certain popular lady(single), whom after much life struggle and hard work became very successful in her career. Bought herself a house worth #400m($1.2m). Being proud of her achievement and hard work, she shares the news with the public. Of course, we can imagine the negative remarks that came with congratulations....lol
What a sick society.
What an unfair society.
What a discriminating society.
Anyways, life and society has never been always fair, but we should understand and know that single/married, man/woman, we all deserves a fair share of the success cake.
Thank you for stopping by. Please leave a comment as I would like to know your thoughts.
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You are so right @ceepee. Single ladies in this part of the world get look down on. Many single ladies are scared of success for fear of been called names. Someone once told me that in yoruba culture, when a single lady lives alone, it protrays that she is not responsible.
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Thanks for stopping by. Your contribution is appreciated.
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I would say that humans are meant to be living together. So a woman must have a man and vice versa. We should give each other room to make our relationship successful.
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True. But the question here is not if people should be married or not. The issue is should a lady be name a prostitute because she is single and successful?
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Errm, I fully understand the picture you wanted to and did paint. But I want to say that that is just an opinion of a few men. Things are changing now.
Personally, I won't want to have a lazy ass, entirely husband dependent, non industrial lady as a wife or be in a relationship with one.
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Yes, lots are changing now. But most successful ladies get a pinch of the insult most times
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The yorubas are the worst in convincing that a successful woman is not a prostitute...and the trend nowadays for young women is to work hard and get a lot of money whereas the men are just sitting doing nothing!!
Its alarming really, as much as the women want independency, its looking like the men are gradually becoming dependent on their women and at the end the man would leave because one way or the other, his ego would be bruised. No wonder we have a lot of single mothers and irresponsible men.
This is a crucial topic on the table.
Keep steeming,
Love ❤❤,
@soorefunmi
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You said it all dear. Thats is the typical yoruba belief.
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I dont think this is tribe dependent. There are alot of people with different opinion in different tribes and walks of life. While there are irresponsible men, there are a lot of hard-working men that will cherish a made lady.
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No is not particular to one tribe. She just mention the tribe she is use to and know well.
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Please let's not narrow this down to tribalism
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No, i am not being tribalistic, i am yoruba too, i am just saying it is sooo hard to convince your yoruba parents or family members that as a female you should be very successful, most times they might feel you would not get a good husband if you are a successful woman. You get my point now?
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I just love you already. It was as if you know what was on my mind. Typical yoruba way of thinking. Not all of them though, but is mainly common among them.
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No one wants to marry upcoming ladies these days. Many guys are on the look out for made ladies. I think the mentality of successful doesnt mean submissiveness is changing already.
Thank you for this well thought out message.
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Well, some men still feel intimidated with successful ladies. Quite a lot even.
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Its unfortunate that our society views women as nothing more than objects. I wish some of these people will come back as women in their next life, maybe then they will appreciate what you girls go through.. Keep working hard dear.. Where have you been ? longest time
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Awwww!! My dear friend visited today. Thanks for stopping by. I have been around, off and on kinna. Will msg you on discord.
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In my opinion, submission is not a function of success or lack of it.
There are successful ladies that are super submissive. And there are also some broke-arse girls that are very proud.
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