There comes a point in our lives that we understand that no one and nothing truly belongs to us, not completely and as such they can exist without our presence. This does not stop us from wanting to feel the owners of things, of people and situations, but it's exactly when we fall into this trap, into this illusion that we experience pain.
The more we try to control things, the more pain we will experience. I’m sure you’ve met a few people in your own life who like to be in control of everything around them, they try to be. Have you not noticed how much stress they endure, how unhappy they see at times, how disappointed they always live?
The truth is that we must learn to let go, to understand that for every element of our life we can control there are thousands we can’t. Waking up from this illusion that everything that happens is because of us, due to us, for us, is quite liberating. All of the sudden we don’t need to feel guilt for things that we really had nothing to do with.
I’m not trying to say that we should all conform to everything, that idea lives on the other extreme. I’m talking about separating our ego from the things we have absolutely no control over. That is a very powerful position to be in, no doubt about it.
Since attempting to list all the things we have no control over would probably take us all evening, let me attempt to list a few that we can have control over: We can control what we do with our life, we can learn to control how we feel about things, we can learn to control our focus and dedication.
I’ll ask you then my reader, is this something we can all do? Is this somewhat unattainable? I happen to believe these ideas to be elemental to our peace, to our growth and to our health. This can be a life changing truth in your life too.
Until next time my friends, hope everyone is having a beautiful week.
This is absolutely something we can all do. While it might not come naturally, learning to let go of outcomes is an incredibly valuable skill. When you make this a core practice in your life, the payouts will continue to grow. Next time you find yourself stressed, try relaxing and focusing on your breathing. As you continue to choose your reactionary state, you will train yourself to be more relaxed and over time you can perfect the art of not needing to be in control. Much love, hope you all find what you are looking for.
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thank you for the kind wishes.. cheers
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Great little article @chbartist. One of my favourite quotes is from Buddha where he says attachment is the root of suffering. It teaches us to let go of our attachments, since ultimately we can't control the bigger things in our world.
Personally I find I try to control things more when I am getting stressed, then realise this and start to let go again. Letting go takes a lot of practice! And as you say, it's not a lack of responsibility, it's about doing the things we can to influence and shape our lives, and then getting out of the way. The way things unfold or the outcome we get may not be what we expect or hope for, but if we can see it with open minds and hearts then our best interests will always be delivered.
One of my favourite songs as the moment is "it's yours once you give it away" by Radnor & Lee. It suggests once we give something away it is returned to us in kind. Another art to practice in our lives. Give away love, kindness and gratitude and it is returned to us.
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Thank you for sharing... I'm going to look up that tune... cheers mate! love the handle btw..
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Very good post, even better message :-) Thanks @chbartist, this isn't easy to do, but very valuable advice indeed.
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It is fantastic to learn the approach that we must have in our lives every day, to liberate, it is a way to heal guilt that is not really yours, it is a way to live more freely and to focus our energies better, attachment doubles the burden and makes it increasingly difficult to live a calm and harmonious life, the detail of many (and I include myself) is to learn to recognize the scope of our lives, the control is ours only for those things that depend on you, it is worthwhile to internalize this subject and take into account that while there is one you can control, another thousand slip out of your hands, the important thing is to believe in us as humans, that we can make mistakes and rise even stronger, thank you for sharing, happy day.
Forgive my mistakes in English, I use a translator
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Very well written and explained. Yes, we can't control or choose what happens to us. But in my opinion, the way we react to what happen to us determine whether they are in control or we are.
Thanks for this amazing piece @chbartist.
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sometimes it is also difficult to control what we feel or think because we put our emotions to depend on others, it is really a vicious circle, but you really are right, but you want more disappointments, more accumulated stress and if that were not enough they also leave a little their own approach, sometimes they forget how to live their own life without being aware of controlling others. Good topic. REGARDS
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I appreciate your thoughts and agree of course!! all the best
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Very, very true. My husband and I saw a marriage counselor a few years back when we were struggling, and she said this very thing. The only person you can control is yourself, and while you cannot control things like the other person’s honesty or integrity, through controlling your own actions and responses, you can inspire better behavior from them. Wise words!
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This is something I like to appreciate. The main idea of your article is great . If we understand and acknowledge our real self than to just let our ego takes us to an illusion and make us so proud of the things which in reality we don't own, it would be then an addition to the real world and will show the real face of humanity.
It's so difficult to talk about our own faults and your article is based on this, I appreciate your idea and the description. Be blessed
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No pain no gain
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If you care enough for the living, make a better place for you and for all. They just look good with heart. how a single word , can make a heart open.
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is that the song? kkkk
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Hmmm :D :D
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...there comes a time when others think that we should do is in direct conflict with what our head or our heart asks us to carry out, and that is when we must decide if our priority is to please others or please ourselves.....
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This is insightful. Thanks for a beautiful piece once more
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True Words my friend. I'll just take an other point of view on this topic and say, that since i don't have my emotions in control, i lost control of any basic thing in my life. Most decision we all take, are driven by emotions, so this should be the most important thing we need to control.
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I'm definitely having a beautiful week. And going with the flow is the most amazing feeling ever. This week, I've felt that I'm in parallel with life. I don't know if there are words to explain but it sure does feel great to be alive to live life! Such a great revelation for me!
Thank you for this great post! @chbartist
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Very good post
It.s artikel can help heart break tens
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You got a 16.05% upvote from @postpromoter courtesy of @chbartist!
Want to promote your posts too? Check out the Steem Bot Tracker website for more info. If you would like to support the development of @postpromoter and the bot tracker please vote for @yabapmatt for witness!
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