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An AV Fistula is a grafted artery and vein, for dialysis patients that is undergoing dialysis at a daily basis they have to have an access for large volume of blood that can be pumped in and out so that the body can get a good clean for every session considering that every session only lasts for 4 hours.

An AV fistula can be done at the wrist area where they graft the artery and the big superficial vein near it and in turn the vein will grow big and transform into an artery-like function which means that large volume of blood will begin to pass through by it. Now by being like an arterylike it will go directly to the heart with a greater force compared to not being grafted to the artery, it is not an issue until you make another AV fistula on the other arm which I think AV surgery doctors will not do because it will affect the heart.

MY AV fistula is about 19 years old now, it got created after the first one grew big, about 5-6 times smaller than my current fistula. This current AV fistula of mine is now about a cupful with its size. What worrries me is that it is now getting bigger substantially as time passes by.

I couldn't ignore it more because it sometimes produces this weird ache as if it is trying to somewhat explode. So I am thinking that it probably had reached its maximum size and is manifesting a size threshold that it can handle. If this thing explodes then I only have seconds to live because I do not think that I can ever stop the blood from spurting out like a fireman's hose because AV fistulas especially mine does have a high pressure blood going though it.

All that I can do now is to pray that my old AV fistula would last longer, actually it had been a less problematic fistula compared to others which died in a relatively short amount of time. This fistula's problem now is its transformation into a hideously big and scary fistula. For may years I didn't believe that this life-saving body tool of mine would not get any problems or will get ever worse but in-fact it is showing sins of problems.

I am just scared of putting a solution over it because I was told that if they worked on it through corrective surgery and they didn't or wasn't able to stop the bleeding then they will be forced to cut my arm off. That is unacceptable of course for me because I couldn't lose any of my now defective body parts and taking one of my best parts is and will never be on the table to be taken-out, I just rather die than to suffer such unthinkable scenario.

But if pain will develop into a worse state than compared to now I might consider going to the AV doctor and have this one fixed. I do not know where the doctor will create a temporary fistula while the new one is maturing but I will not agree for it to be put into my groin area because it will mean that I cannot do my toilet business sitting up. Those scenarios are what I am afraid of, from cutting off my limbs because of unforeseen and uncontrolled possibility to experiencing the worst possible discomfort, I cannot even imagine those would even happen and yet can happen.

I Will Be Facing A Bloody Mess Soon

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Thanks for reading. :D

Special thank you to ALL

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C0ME 0N Y0!─=≡Σ((( つ•̀ω•́)つLET’S GO!

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